drakcorian

time and patience.

2009-09-12T00:43:00.002+08:00

ever had the feeling,
that when you're waiting for something,

a person you're meeting coz the person's fucking late,
the bus to fucking arrive in the fucking hot sun,
waiting for the godammed mrt to reach your destination,

that you feel you could just "donate" your time away to someone else?

for example,

you're waiting for a fucking bus,
and then your bus comes, but out in the distance from the same direction, you see some mad woman trying to catch the bus that's slowly overtaking her in speed.

don't you think you could just "donate" your waiting time,
giving her more time to run/walk after the bus,
and in the other hand, give you less time to waste and wait?

another example,

just waiting for your friend.
give that waiting time for your friend,
to your other friend who takes so fucking long to reach,
and you get to waste less by giving him that time?

gosh, i've gotta invent some fucking scientific gadget for instances like these.

READING.

2009-06-29T00:38:00.002+08:00

The Reading Rap- TomaMoto

reading is so gangsta
reading is so cool
reading teaches you stuff
even when you're not in school

reading is so awesome
reading is so dope
you'll be a fool
to drop a book
like an inmate
dropping soap

when you read
your brain gets so big
unless you do advanced math
like calculus and trig
reading makes you smart
and so creative too
if you give up reading
then i'll say
FUCK YOU.

just a cool song i found on newgrounds. :D

When was i born?

2009-06-14T12:30:00.002+08:00

how what started out as a normal sunday lunch family (minus my sister) conversation became a THOUSAND DOLLAR BET. (with $50 as interest for me being the bookie. xD)

ME: sigh, july coming soon already sia.

MUM: what you want for your birthday? bbq?

ME: eh, what time was i born ah.

DAD: AIYA, SOMETIME AT NIGHT LAH. THAT DAY YOUR MOTHER TAKE HALF-DAY OFF AND THEN...

MUM: RUBBISH! HE WAS BORN IN THE AFTERNOON LAH, THAT ONE WAS DENISE AND THE DAY WE GOT THE NEW MAID VERO, REMEMBER?

DAD: NO LAH.

ME: FUCCCCCCK IT LAH. YOU KNOW WHAT? I DON'T WANNA KNOW ALREADY LAH KNN. Y'ALL SO SURE THEN BET LAH.

MUM: OKAY LAH, I CORRECT YOU GIVE ME THOUSAND DOLLARS.

ME: i be bookie thanks.

DAD: why need to bet for what? i know i correct already.

MUM: YOU SO SURE WHY YOU NO BALLS BET? SCARED LOSE AH.

and i just go into wtf-mode,

ME: aiya the loser give me 50 bucks correct already lah, nabei.

facebook.

2009-05-21T14:48:00.003+08:00

now that facebook is in the trend,
especially all the quizzes,
allow me to show you one of my results (and juowi's)
WHAT WILL YOU BE WHEN YOU GROW UP?

yup, i'm a whore.

that aside, another trend of applications,
that is now dying, are the wars.
you got mafia wars, dragon wars, vampire wars, racing wars, fashion wars, etc...

yup, i bought a I LOVE MUM tattoo, grants you defence stats. LOL.

wtf i'm really getting bored.

SEGATA SANSHIRO

2009-05-13T00:47:00.005+08:00

Segata Sanshiro- DruoxtheShredder (from newgrounds)

*epic intro*

Running down the dirt road
with a Sega saturn on his back
He's come to kick your childrens' ass
And send them back inside!

No one is safe
you are all doomed
A judo throw for you!

land and explooode!
you will learn the Naaaaaaame!

SEEGATAA SANSHIROO!
SEEGATAA SANSHIROO!
Better than Chuck Norris! it's Sanshiroo!!

There is No place that is safe
He will hunt all of you down
He will then throw everyone
and then he'll choke you out

Dancing in a nightclub only to to turn around

then you will SEEEEEE!!!

Standing ooover youuuuuu!!!

SEEGATAA SANSHIROO!
SEEGATAA SANSHIROO!
He'll rape your childhood, it's Sanshiroooooo!!!

Long Ago...
Before the time of Chuck Norris
There once was a man who roamed Japan with a Sega saturn on his back
and he found people to play it
because he knew:
THAT THE SEGA SATURN WILL REIGN SUPREME!!!

*epic solo part...sorta*

He will never lose
you can not win
He can kick a baseball
an Asian Juggernaut

Try to kick a goal with a kick of penalty

You will then miss!

Because he liiifteeed the goooaaal!!!

SEEGATAA SANSHIROO!
SEEGATAA SANSHIROO!
There's no end to pain, Sanshiroooooo!!!

He knows when you're sleeping
and He knows when you're awake
yes, He needs no facial hair
12 bricks his head can also break

you think he's Santa until his face is gone

Then you will seeeee

His true identityyyyyyy!!!

SEEGATAA SANSHIROO!
SEEGATAA SANSHIROO!
He'll rape your childhood, it's Sanshiroooooo!!!

SEEGATAA SANSHIROO!
SEEGATAA SANSHIROO!
He's Segatahaaaaaa-aa-aaaa-aa-
aaaaa....Sanshiroooo!!!

NO BASEBALL ALLOWED BITCHES!!!

HOOO-EEYOW!

what the fuck just happened?

you haven't seen epic unless you've seen
SEGATA SANSHIRO.
THE MASCOT FOR THE SEGA SATURN COMMERCIAL WHEN IT FIRST CAME OUT IN JAPAN YEARS GO.
found a cover of his theme song on newgrounds,
got addicted to it,
now its playing on repeat on my itunes.

in case you haven't heard of him,
the videos in the lyrics are references from no place but YOUTUBE.

he's this judo guy with epic skills, excelling in sports and thrashing all naughty kids who don't go home with the sega saturn console on his back, telling them to go home and play the CONSOLE INSTEAD.

and this is my favourite, zombies. :D

still can remember the first COLOURED, 3-D SONIC GAME ON SEGA MANXSZXSZ.

he's believed to have sacrificed himself by stopping a missile that was launched into the sega office building by competitors sony and nintendo. LOL.

"segata sanshiro will forever live in our hearts."

okay enough of the judo dude,
juowi brought DRUGS to school today.
"EH MATT WANNA TRY DRUGS? RAINBOW PILLS FROM MALAYSIA."

"wtf's that?"

"put on ice-cream one lah, the topping."

"WA DAMN SHIOK LEH."

kept me awake the whole dammed day no matter how tired, boring, mundane the lesson was. the worst part of it all, i was actually awake and fully aware of all lessons today in school which i didn't understand a shit. the torture was just... undescribably hell.

installed xp on my mac using boot camp the other day,
AND L4D CAN WORK AFTER VIV GAVE ME THE IDEA OF INSTALLING IT ON MY MAC.

WOOHOO NO LAG BITCHES.

i feel damn fucking lucky,
coz just today i sat beside juowi, with his lagging facebook.
"damn this laptop lah."

and then was shaun,
"WA LAU, BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH."

and i'm like smiling playing my l4d in class.
zomfg i'm such an asshole.

took some dynamic picture and remembered how i used to purposely tried too hard to take photos of myself to freak people out.

like in my acer,

sigh acer, i miss you.

aircon remote control.

2009-05-09T23:24:00.002+08:00

my mum's out on her desktop, watching her cheenapok dramas
whilst trying to book her flight seat to aussie to meet my sis.

she walks into her room
with my dad sleeping on the bed
to complain to him about the bookings when,
she sees the aircon remote on the floor
probably beside the bed.

"SEE WHAT YOU'VE DONE LAH, KEEP CHANGING MY SETTINGS."

my mum's just pissed that my dad keeps spamming the aircon remote control buttons in the dark, playing it like a gameboy.
when it actually is, the weak battery, resetting all settings all over again.

my dad, confused and still in his half-conscience state, gets up,
"uh...? what i do? what happen!"
poor dad.

my mum, still pissed, storms outta the room, changing the aircon mode to the worst possible and crappiest mode ever, fan mode.

yes ladies and gents, there are functions like night mode,

so the aircon won't be so noisy,

normal mode,

and the worst shit, FAN MODE.

she switches it to fan mode,
grabs the remote from the floor,
and spits happily all over the house,
"SEE LAH, PLAY PLAY PLAY WITH MY REMOTE, NOW YOU SUFFER."

and walks out of the room
and back to her computer
watching her cheenapok drama
still giving that evil smile,
grinning from ear to ear.

and my dad's left in the room now
with the aircon set to function like a fan
he's probably dying from dehydration now or something.

maybe i should go help him now.
but i took my time a even wrote this blogpost anyway.

NAAAAAAAAAH, WE'LL LET HIM LEARN.

but seriously, it isn't his fault
those darn batteries keep running out.
some remotes have their settings changed to CHINESE.
or in IMPERIAL MEASUREMENTS.

sucks to be me.

my new camera- my macbook.

2009-05-08T14:34:00.005+08:00

my new camera is now officially my macbook pro.

with a sucky iphone,
and a bulky dslr,

there's always something certain i'll bring to school,
my laptop.

and with its sucky webcam with uber cool functions,
i can take pictures,
as long as its not paiseh for me to dish it out and start up photobooth.

been sick since wednesday.
felt like shit,
so i decided to pay a little visit to the polyclinic,
with juowi of course, whom i deep down really feel that i was the one who i passed the flu too. LOL SORRY JUOWI.

they gave us masks, took our temperature, and it was crowded like shit.

and into missing lessons,
who better to join us than
CHENGXI.
LOL.

he didn't follow us in though,
proved too lazy to get an mc for class,
but joined us for l4d later anyway,

yes, that's the lanshop.
and yes, i took out my laptop in a lanshop.
how retarded is that.
three poly boys all with laptops,
chose to go to a lanshop just to play l4d.

talked to martin yesterday,
told me he failed his 2.4 by 9 seconds,
and his pull-up by 1.
at least he told me the previous gym-ing session proved helpful.
that's all i have left to say.
for now at least.

well, ANYMORE GYM-ING MUST TELL ME OKAY,
I DON'T WANNA GO IN NS 8 WEEKS EARLIER ALSO. LOL.

started a massive bitchfit last night,
must be the flu, its really getting to me,
everytime i sleep at night,
i grow afraid of not being able to wake up,
not being able to breathe,
just dying from my nightmares,
running short of breath.

shaun told me something interesting on msn though,
"EH MATT, GO SEE CHERYL'S PM!"

"I CANNOT SEE LAH, MY MSN LAGGING, MACBOOK SUCKS CAN."

"NEVERMIND, I PRINT SCREEN FOR YOU."

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA I ALMOST GOT A SHOCK TOO.

BUT WHY "M"?

IT COULD BE LIKE

MARTIN (LOL SORRY)
MELVIN
MARVIN
MARIO
MANFRED
MARCUS
MALCOM
MATHIAS
MERLIN (WTF I'M SO EVIL)
MORGAN
MAVIS
MAX
MICHAEL

OR MATTHEW? LOL.

signing out from the suffocating atmosphere of my clustered room,

a boy's name which starts with M.

LOL SORRY CHERYL, JUST HAD TO DO IT MS VIRGIN.

(credits to cynthia who drew me "i'm emo." on my hand. LOL)

"cynthia, don't let matthew distract you."

smoking.

2009-05-04T13:47:00.006+08:00

All Again For You- We The Kings

I couldn't sleep last night
I walked alone
On the beach
Where we always used to go
When we couldn't hook up at home

I thought of you
And the time we jumped the fence
Both sides ripped down
We dove right in
And the cops chased us again

When you were mine
You know

We had it all in front of us
You were the one
I was in love
But you always hurt
the one you lost
I couldn't get enough

You were everything
That's bad for me
Make no apologies
I'm crushed...
Black and blue
But you know
I'd do it all again for you

Today, dressed up
In designer drugs
Dedicated to the one
I'll always love
The one who really messed me up

I let you take the wheel
And the driver's seat
Strapped in
So you get the best of me
Now what's left are the memories

When you were mine
You know

We had it all in front of us
You were the one
I was in love
But you always hurt
The one you lost
I couldn't get enough

You were everything
That's bad for me
Make no apologies
I'm crushed...
Black and blue
But you know
I'd do it all again for you

I am standing in the ocean rain
Rough and ready
For your deadly game
I've got nowhere else to go

We had it all in front of us
You were the one
I was in love
But you always hurt
The one you lost
I couldn't get enough

You were everything
That's bad for me
Make no apologies
I'm crushed...
Black and blue
But you know
I'd do it all again for you
(You know I'd do it all again for you)
(I swear I'd do it all again for you)

got this email from school,
how ironic aye?

just written some externality post for my econs,

Externality cost.

Also known as negative externality.

Negative externalities happen when the social cost is higher than the private cost.

Cigarettes- a demerit good.

Even with all the negative health impacts it has on the smoker, his private benefit provides him or her with an image of independence, and even maturity to most smokers would want to have as they are insecure with their immaturity.

Cigarettes are a demerit good as they have a negative externality against the society. When somebody buys a pack of heavily taxed cigarettes, the person smokes and pollutes the air, hence costing the society more than the individual. It also can lead to other things like lung cancer of the passive smokers around him, costing them to pay the price even though cigarettes are already very heavily taxed in our society.

i think its a SIGN.

dance dance revolution!

2009-04-24T08:29:00.005+08:00

Just Dance (Cover)- Surrender The Dance Floor

Red One, Konvict
GaGa
Surrender The Dance Floor
Oh Oh Eh
Remix

I've had a little bit too much
All of the people start to rush(start to rush by)
A dizzy twister dance
Can't find my drink or man
Where are my keys?
I lost my phone

Whats goin' on, on the floor?
I love this record baby but i can't see straight anymore keep it cool
What's the name of this club?
I can't remember but its alright, a-alright

JUST DANCE!
Gonna be okay
Dada doo doot-n
JUST DANCE!
Spin that record babe
Da da doo doot-n
JUST DANCE!
Gonna be okay
D-d-d dance, dance, dance,just
J-J-JUST DANCE!

Wish i could shut my playboy mouth
How'd I turn my shirt inside out (inside out right)
Control your poison babe
Roses have thorns they say,
And were all gettin' hosed tonight!

What's goin' on, on the floor?
I love this record baby but I can't see straight anymore keep it cool
What's the name of this club?
I can't remember but its alright, alright

When i come through on the dance floor checkin' out that catalogue
Can't believe my eys so many women without a flaw
And I ain't gonna give it up, steady trying to pick it up like a call
I'm a hit up beat it up latch on to it until tomorrow yeah

Shawty I can see that you got so much energy
The way you twirlin' up them hips round and round
And there is no reason at all why you can't leave here with me
In the mean time stay let me watch you break it down

Half psychotic sick hypnotic got my blueprint it's symphonic
Halfpsychotic sick hypnotic got my blueprint electronic
Half psychotic sick hypnotic got my blueprint it's symphonic
half psychotic sick hypnotic got my blueprint electronic

Had the mass dance today.
Like finally.
Those looking for photos and videos, please proceed to facebook to seeeeee! :D
Nope, don’t ask me.
Didn’t win anything.
Nothing at all.
Except bonding with the freshies though!

But that aside, I should concentrate on my own course people first.
That’s right,
What’s the use of being so capable with everyone else,
Managing the masses,
Dancing in masses,
Doing public relations with a cracked smile,
When everyone closer to you,
The own people in your course,
They’re not the same?

Its like how my close my dad is to his wardens,
But at home, he’s just a completely different person.
Just completely different.

They tell me I’m slowly becoming like him,
I was his son after all.

Managed to keep the freshies’ spirits up.
Despite practicing so hard for no prizes at all.
With the help of the existing exco,
Anything regarding mood was undoubtedly possible.

Only angie understood me,
By giving me the CORRECT gift.
Something that truly represents me.

And now I’ve become so emo,
I’ve resorted to blogging in the train,
With the people beside me staring at my screen,
Knowing my life stories.

Oh wells.
We work hard,
We play harder.

Practice makes perfect (sense.)
Failure makes us stronger (in persistency)

“do you think FOC was a success? It was a disappointing success to me. My own reasons for being successful, disappointing because of you leaving.”

toilet chaos, washroom calamity.

2009-04-22T08:12:00.005+08:00

Kiss Yourself Goodbye- The All-American Rejects

Blank face little girl
Your colors running down
It’s the one you love
Cry out my world, this copulated kiss
It’s the last that you deserve

I’ve done wrong
I’ve been gone
It’s the one you love
Drink down and your candles burn
Away, away

Dreaming you, is so easy, yeah
If it was up to me, then you would cry tonight
If it was up to you

Take you, take me away
I can’t go with you now
Don’t you wish I’d try
Left just a trace, it's growing colder still
So kiss yourself goodbye

I’ve done wrong
I’ve been gone
It’s the one you love
One drink and your candles burn
Away, away

Dreaming you, is so easy, yeah
If it was up to me, then you would cry tonight
When it's up to you, you kiss yourself goodbye

Let go, push your daisies
A thousand maybes, a thousand left I'm done
A white glow, just for tasting
A life for wasting (it’s the one you love)
And I look into your eyes, it's the one you love

Last one then I fill you up today, today
How can you sleep
When dreaming you, is so easy, yeah
If it was up to me, then you would cry tonight
When its up to you, you kiss yourself goodbye
You would cry tonight (yeah)
So kiss yourself goodbye (yeah)
You would cry tonight (yeah)
So kiss yourself goodbye

early AGAIN for my lecture.
yesterday when i came early, i saw this toilet roll on the floor.
just on the ground.
lying there.
it was as though it was calling my name.

"matthew... MATTHEW... MATTHEW! COME AND PICK ME UP FROM THIS PITIFUL FLOOR."

and erm... so i did.

and that's when we stared camwhoring.

your typical macbook camwhore function.

me and juowi actually thought the tissue roll could do well as a costume for the mass dance. LOL.

it became like our other friend lah.

named him, mr. toilet roll.
when you think you're always being the asshole in life, he's the toilet roll, always taking the shit from you.

such a gentleman of an asswipe, you mr. toilet roll! AWWW.

it has cigarette butts for eyes too! :DDDD

and we actually took it with us through lunch, and dinner.
everytime someone would screw up with holes in their mouths or mess themselves,
i would go,

"EH YOU NEED TISSUE?"

and we even used it to chope place when we eat lah.
EPIC.

had mass dance,
it was quite CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED CENSORED and i really thought the freshies made a very good decision into sacrificing their free cone on b&j's free cone day and chose to come for rehersals in the end.

:DD

went to dinner with my keala GLs afterwards,
missed them like fuck.
they all ate in awe in the presence of mr. toilet roll.
he's a shy person lah. :D

peace out yo! :D

"YOUR MA-DERH SO POORE, THAT SHE HANGS UP USED TOILET ROLLS TO DRY."

epic fail.

2009-04-20T22:09:00.002+08:00

first day of school today, epic fail.
i think what made me so happy today was observing how epic fail people could be in life.

just at 3am some girl called me and yelled,
"CAN YOU PLEASE TELL MY BOYFRIEND TO PICK UP HIS PHONE? YOU'RE LIKE HIS BEST FRIEND. IF NOT I DUMP HIM."

i was like, "who the fuck are you? and what the fuck do you want?"

she replied, "eh sorry wrong number."

LOL.

lucky i was wide awake else who would have known what MORE vulgarities would have spat and made their way outta my mouth? ROFLMFAO.

EPIC FAIL 1.

and just today outside the school there was this young punk trying to smoke and hold the cigarette in different ways,
he accidenatlly put the litted end of the butt into his mouth and screamed. LOL.

EPIC FAIL 2.

part 3:
so i went home, took 74 to dover, stopped at sp. and i needed to pee.
there was this janitor mopping the floor, i apologised for stepping on his mopped floor.
and there was this other guy, probably from sp, peeing in the urinal beside me.
we both realised the janitor was about to mop the area on the floor around the sink, so we chionged our pee and raced to the same sink. he was initially beating me to the sink when he suddenly stopped and muttered, "shit."

i was only when i walked past him i realised HIS DICK WAS LIKE STUCK IN HIS PANTS.

I GRINNED, AND WASHED MY HANDS, AND LEFT THE TOILET.

as i left the toilet i still could like hear the janitor laughing at him. LOL.

EPIC FAIL 3.

then when i finally reached pasir ris, this aunty was like swinging her plastic bag until damn stylo milo. it was filled with rubbish and she aimed her swing precisely at the side hole of the bin when it bounced back from the hole and onto her face. I FUCKING LAUGHED AT HER AND SHE JUST STARED AT ME, NORMALLY PICKED UP HER TRASH BAG, AND NORMALLY PUT IT IN THE BIN.

EPIC FAIL 4.

the last one was when i met yilong at pasir ris interchange.
she aunty fell down as she rushed for the bus 12. (WOOHOO BUS 12 ROCKXZSXZSXSZ) we rushed to help her up and yilong told me, "WHERE'S YOUR PEER LEADER CHARACTER, HAS IT ALL TAUGHT YOU NOTHING?"

then was when i began to think,
should i have helped all those people that i laughed at earlier today?

help the girl with her relationship problems with her boyfriend even though she was a random stranger?

help the man stuff his penis back into his zip?

help the aunty throw her rubbish and teach her how to aim?

help the young punk smoke his cigarette properly?

OR MAYBE NOT.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

fine day, first day. :D

an hour late, a cigarette short.

2009-04-16T14:02:00.002+08:00

Just had freshmen orientation camp/FOC/free-of-charge.
After the camp, it made me remind of how i was like in the past. Not like a part of them, but just reminded me.
Since the past year, so much has happened.
Friends changed, environment changed, mindsets shifted, thinkings changed, perspectives changed, things changed.
Things changed about me.
Remember how i used to be such a camp person when i was in secondary school?
i don't.
Not after this camp at least.
But something i was hoping that would come back to me, didn't.
My enthusiaism, my belonging to the certain schools and organisations, didn't.
I don't belong, but i just love the feeling of eurphoria when i just sit, observe, and thinking about these people.
Not something different, but the same as what i've felt previously.
Maybe their prime was now, and mine, years ago.
Maybe my culture is just different from them.
Maybe not.
I wanna be like them, but i know i somehow can't.
I wanna go back to the sleepless nights,
The useless fights.
I wanna go back to the line of light.
I just don't belong.
I feel that i've them them down somewhat.
Like how they asked me to narrate,
Even if i wasn't in anyway able to participate.
I feel like i didn't work or do what i was told to do in the best of my abilities.
Disappointment in myself, is that what they call it?
Disappointment in wishing things could have been better if you were there to make it better.
Now i'm looking at the narration list.
That i was given to introduce the new lovers.
The new lovers of hms.
Their time was just then.
Only when i let it slip it by and put it all in vain.
Still looking at the list, looking a day well spent,
A day that could have been improved more likely.
Sitting in the bus stop, doing nothing.
The ostrich, the rabbit, the peacock, the panda, the pigeon, the lion, the cow, the monkey, and the barbarian.
Our exco zodiac.
But wait, there's one undetermined zodiac, me.
I always knew that there were ten of us.
And that only four would make a comeback next year.
Would i be one of them?
I wonder.
Probably not.
With emotions overflowing and my puny mind wandering.
I think.
I think hard.
I think hard about those that would make their return next year.
As the thought passes my mind,
Let it be fate,
Let it be desinty,
Let it be what you call it,
They walk past by.
Seeing me doing a thing i shouldn't even have dreamt or even imagined.
They saw me.
The pigeon throwing her remarks on my shameful act.
Defaulting me to roleplay the liar.
The barbarian and panda stop to show they care, concerned along with their seniors.
But i regretfully reject their aid.
But wait, only a few were amongst them.
Are these the chosen four?
But there were only three.
Right?
Are they chosen based on social skills to keep up with their seniors?
Or cases where people are judged according to personal cabilities?
My thoughts drift further as i keep thinking why i feel so left out.
Is it because of the different way we do things?
They different ways we celebrate,
And how we muse.
Could it be the clash of ideas that has led me to becoming such an introvert?
Hearing them sing praises of themselves,
Especially when i feel such a waste,
Introvert.
Another thing i'm becoming to think i'm becoming to see.
To see of myself.
They say introverts have their strengths to make up for their weaknesses.
If so, i'm definately not seeing any in current circumstances.
Not like i have any choice to choose what i want to be.
With the current clashes on idealism.
I just keep telling myself that different people have their different ways of thinking.
If said be, do they keep it a hush while the others say what they want?
Do they become introverts too?
Or do they commence their disputes on their way of thinking,
Protecting what they think is right,
Protecting it all too well.
Just like an absolute defence, that no minority can penetrate their thick heads with.
Their thick heads all caught up in success of themselves.
What do they deem success as?
Probably a whole lot different level from me.
Probably not even the in same category, and definately not same level as me.
Or maybe its just me.
Not being happy with what i have.
What i've achieved- nothing.
I've always been the greedy bastard.
Taking all the fame and credit.
Which explains why i'm so fucking pissed off with these people.
One person can be at the spotlight only at once.
And person has been in it for far too long.
And what if the seniors leave?
What will become of us?
Fighting for the spotlight?
Or simply struggling just to attain their leadership.
I wouldn't bother.
Not anymore.
Because i've tried.
Because i don't belong.
Correction, i don't deserve to feel belonged.
I don't deserve to be amongst them.
Most laugh when they hear i'm one of them.
Probably because the laughers are the people i belong with.
Or not.
I just demand too much from life.
Too much from all this.
It's just too much.
When i don't get what i want.
It's either all.
Or nothing.
They deserve so much more from me.
Because i owe them so fucking much in their efforts of bringing me back.
I want to go back.
But i just can't.
With the amount of people i've been letting down.
I just can't.
I keep saying that i won't,
But i never fail to just ruin and screw everything up.
Letting them down all over again.
Then came the drinking and laughing,
Another factor in which i led the pack.
Caught AGAIN for inappropriate decency.
Is this another sign for me that i don't belong?
I just don't know.
It makes me just wanna give up on everything altogether.
Everything i've done, everything i've worked for.
But then again, wouldn't i be letting down more people yet again?
Why the fuck does all these bad things have to get compressed into the same fucking day?
My fault for introducing a way to clear the alcohol fast,
And to make them drink water to get sober, even faster.
If not for me my accomplices wouldn't get their asses scalded.
Without my stupidity and immaturity everything should have gone the way i want them to.
I'm just a boy not deserving to exist around here.
But faith, not luck brought me here.
According to someone.
Something i find very hard to believe.
Except for the person trying to make a fool out of himself.
Or take me myself and i as the fool.
What made me special?
What made me stand out?
I always wonder what a beautiful mess
That i've got myself into by
Sheer,
Pure,
Dumb,
Luck.

keybord spoilt

2009-03-27T14:04:00.004+08:00

Bring It (Snakes On A Plane)- Cobra Starship

"That's it!
I've had it with these motherfucking snakes
on this motherfucking plane!"

Times are strange
We got a free upgrade for
snakes on a plane.
Fuck em, I don't care.
Bought the cheap champagne,
we're going down in flames, hey.

Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.
Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.
Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.
Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.

So kiss me goodbye.
Honey, I'm gonna make it out alive.
So kiss me goodbye.
I can see the venom in their eyes.
Goodbye.

It's time to fly,
to make the stars align
with the turpentine
lounging in their suits and ties.
Watch the whore's parade
for the price you paid, hey.

Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.
Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.
Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.
Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.

So kiss me goodbye.
Honey I'm gonna make it out alive
So kiss me goodbye.
I can see the venom in their eyes

So kiss me goodbye.
Honey, I'm gonna make it out alive
So kiss me goodbye.
I can see the venom in their eyes
Goodbye.

Ladies and gentlemen
These snakes are slitherin'
with dollar signs in they eyes
with tongues so reptilian
This industry's venemous
with cold-blooded sentiment
No need for nervousness
It's just a little turbulence.

So kiss me goodbye.
Honey I'm gonna make it out alive
So kiss me goodbye.
I can see the venom in your eyes

So kiss me goodbye.
Honey, I'm gonna make it out alive
So kiss me goodbye.
I can see the venom in their eyes
Goodbye.

Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.
Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring.
Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.
Oh, I'm ready for it
Come on, bring it.

We seem to be losing altitude
at an alarming pace
Midtown downtown
Snakes on a blog
I suggest you grab your ankles
and kiss your ass goodbye.

tody is just not my dy becuse the "@" key of my keybord is spoilt,
time to get @ new fucking lptop.

godmmit i even hd problems logging in into blogger by typing my emil coz it contins two "@"s

nd ll my friends on msn re like lughing t me coz they're giggling nd trying their best to decode my messges.

FUCKING HELL LH!

i cn't even lugh properly.

hhhhhhhhh

i would hve to do the more gy version of the lugh,

hehehehehehehe.

shit y'lls.

romantic music videos.

2009-03-25T10:25:00.002+08:00

so i've been at home all the time,
guess what i've been doing?
YOUTUUUUBE.

been watching all those corny romantic music videos there's two i wanna talk about.

1. TONG HUA.
this song has been standing out ever since secondary school man

just coz you're a fucking pervert who stares at tits and bleed through your nose doesn't make you are cute singer on the piano, i don't HATE the song, just hate the concept. LOL OOPS.

2. BECAUSE I'M A GIRL.
this song is about a photographer meeting this hair saloon girl, them falling in love, her accidentally getting her eyes spilled with photographic acid, making her blind, and him donating BOTH pairs of eyes to her.

I MEAN? WHY CAN'T HE JUST FREAKING DONATE ONE EYE?
THEN THEY COULD BE KOREAN PIRATES TOGETHER.
as quoted from a comment in youtube,
"okay realistically, he could have just given one eye...then they cud be pirates together.

i mean come on, those aren't just eyes...they're asian eyes, the best eyes ever...because no other type of eye can see thru slits.

and btw, good luck in your photography career bud. "

LOL I JUST LOVE POKING FUN AT PEOPLE'S MISERY.

st. patrick

2009-03-18T01:33:00.002+08:00

HAPPY ST PATRICK'S DAY!
a day spent at home, i found some pretty neat stuff whilst on the net.

just did a quiz on facebook,
its about my old school, st pats, and the questions are,

1.Today is half day of school. Do you bring all the textbooks according to normal timetable?
According to normal timetable? Don't worry. I bring all my textbooks everyday. I want to study if there is spare time in school!
What for? Heavy eh! Today is half day and my bag is so heavy!!! I want to go shopping later!
I will bring some textbooks. We need them during lessons.

2.You are talking during lessons, and your teacher reprimand you not to talk again. What will you do?
I will say sorry, and keep quiet during lesson.
I will answer back : "It's a courtesy. My friend ask me something, and I must reply him! CME teaches me that!"
I will grumble and talk when the teacher does not see me.

3.What happened if you are taking something from your friend, such as calculator?
I will take, but I will return shortly.
If my friend does not see, that's MINE! If my friend sees it, I will say : "Sorry lah, just joking."
That's consider as stealing! I will not do that!

4.You see a piece of rubbish lying on the floor under your desk. What will you do?
I will not let that happen again. I will straight away pick that rubbish and throw it away in the dustbin.
I will sabotage my friend by kicking the rubbish to my friend's desk. I am lazy to pick it up!
I will ignore the rubbish. I will wait my teacher's instruction to pick it up.

5.Your teacher gives you a form and ask your parents to sign on Monday. It's due to Friday, when will you hand up the form?
Wait until friday to come then sign. Wait until the deadline.
I just keep inside my bag or make it to paper aeroplane. It's due to friday right? Next monday also can... Relax
On monday night, I quickly ask my parents to sign and will return the form on Tuesday.

6.Today is school's function day, such as Sports' Day. What will you do?
I will come, but I just enjoy with my friends with my PSPs and handphones.
Haiyah, relax at home. Ask mommy to write a letter or just go to doctor to collect MC. I'm lazy to go to such activities. Wasting time
I will try to participate and take my parts in the school activities! It's fun!

7.It's understood that Wednesday is CCA day. Your teacher gives you homework on that day, and wants it the next day (Thursday). What is your reaction?
I will try to argue, but never mind. Maybe can copy from friends.
Quickly write it on the diary, and during my spare time finish that homework.
I will argue with my teacher: "But sir! Today's CCA day!!! Cannot give homework one!!!"

8.Your A Maths textbook is damn heavy, and today's A Maths lesson only two periods (40 minutes). What will you do?
Sometimes I bring, sometimes I don't. Depends on my mood.
I bring everything related to A Maths. Do we need also the workbook? I will bring, too!
I don't bother to bring. What for? It's only TWO PERIODS!!!

9.When will you raise your hand during lessons?
I want to go to the toilet! Altough sometimes my teacher never allow me. Must hold organ!
I never raise my haind. Lazy ah.
I will raise my hand to ask some questions. It's obvious, right?

10.Queue in the canteen is damn long. You are so hungry, what will you do?
No choice, must queue. But sometimes I ask my friend to buy me the food.
It's obvious. You must cut the queue in order to eat quickly. It's fun.
I should go to other stores which have short queue. I must eat quickly and study during recess!

yeah you should know which are the "right" answers to being true patrician aye?

sigh i miss school,
just the other day i bumped into stall 4 aunty/uncle taking the bus back to bedok,
"EH WHERE YOU STUDYING NOW?"

so i told them my trademark reply,
"aiya, i studying to be social worker lah, my course name sounds chim but its just simply, plainly, social worker."

i told them i missed the canteen food, and everything in st pats, even if people were to fight in the canteen, or use their food to fight in the canteen, or etc...

"YOU COME BACK LAH, AUNTY BLANJA YOU COME EAT MY FOOD AGAIN."

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I FUCKING MISS ST PATS.

rascal.

2009-03-12T00:21:00.002+08:00

GOD: Where were you?
ADAM: Hiding.
GOD: Why were you hiding?
ADAM: I was naked.
GOD: How did you know you were naked?
ADAM: Oops. Shit.

see what happens when you fucking screw up?
just ONCEEEEEE.

people tend to stereotype you
just like the other time i jio-ed jasmine to school for mass dance
and i came late.
JUST ONCE YOU KNOW.
WA LAU SHE TAKE COME WHAT ONE ICE-CREAM TRUCKLOAD OF COMMENTS COME SHOOT ME LAH.

RIGHT JASMINEEEEXSZXSZ?

fucking hell.
taught the hms society the mass dance today,
was actually quite surprised they danced quite passably well.

went to keagan's house today to teach him tuition.
OH YA AND I GOT A JOB, AS A FUCKING TUITION TEACHER.

AHAHAHA A MOTHERFUCKING TUITION TEACHERS YOU BUNCH OF DUMBASSES, TOP THAT THEN COME TO ME ON TALKING TERMS WITH MONEY BLOODY SCUM-SUCKING ROADWHORES.

anyway, on the way to his house, this dude kept staring at me in the bus,
just plain me listening to my favourite bullet for your valentine's song,
when he got off the same stop at me,
he went,

"WA YOUNG RASCALS NOWADAYS AH, LISTEN TO SO LOUD THE MUSIC ONE."

to his friend who was waiting for him.

taught keagan the 7-up DRINKING GAME.

WHAAAT? IT WAS GOOD FOR HIM TO REMEMBER HIS SEVEN MULTIPLICATION TABLES RIGHT?

"okay i wrong, you eat sweet."
"you wrong, i eat sweet."

then i went to st ants to help siva with her prep, when i was late.
met up with tarci, marianne, and viv there,
went for dinner.
siva kept reminding me to remove my earrings and wax my hair else the teachers will all bitch about her.

i just can't fucking stand those stereotypical people.
just coz i'm a
emoboywithfullbackwhothinksthewholeworldhatesmewhichlistenstoheavymetalblastingmusiconthetrainstoppingpeoplefromenjoyingtheirownlife
is gonna be a problem to them.

oh wells, gotta remove my earrings before the parents of young kiddos thinks some ah beng is teaching them wrong things in school.

its been a long time since i heard the wrong "rascal" spoken out of other people's mouths, passing their lips ever so quickly.

it was during primary school, when i was still living in tampines on the 4th floor of block 131...
my neighbour was talking to my dad when he first changed his car and got his first bmw,
my dad just parked his car and you know my dad, parking damn pro one. can just drive in the parklot and don't need to readjust his car to make straighter.

and he was heading up the lift and opening the door for me and my sis when stopped by our neighbour,

NEIGHBOUR: wa paul, you see that rascal in that bmw just now? he just fucking park his car so straight, and never even bothered to repark again.
DAD: that was me, its my new car lah.

OKAY, BACK TO REMOVING MY EARRINGS YOU BASTARDSSSXZXZS.

GOD: You've eaten from that tree that I commanded you not to eat from, haven't you?
ADAM: (experiencing his first-ever pass-the-bucket-instinct) It wasn't my fault, The woman you made to be with me- she gave me the fruit, so it was her fruit. And you gave me the woman, so this one's kind of on you, God.
GOD(to Eve): What have you done?
EVE: It wasn't my fault. It was the snake's fault. It tricked me.
ADAM: Nice, Eve. When in doubt, blame the snake. That'll stand up in court.

For its part, the snake probably looked around for something lower than itself to blame, but all the other animals had (wisely) stampeded away from the crime scene to save their own skins.

So God did what any responsible lawman does- he started passing out punishment to the preps.

godammit.
JUST FOR BEING LATE.

dad's wish- son's despair.

2009-02-18T21:53:00.003+08:00

today i told my dad that the saunas affect your sperm count
as all the steamrooms would do is just fucking boil your sperms to death.

"SO WHAT?!?!
NOT SAYING I ALSO NEED ANYMORE!"

its been a real long time since i ever talked to my dad proper.
just a moment ago i was at the sofa trying to get my ass off the computer
and into the livng room.

disliked the channel he kept switching,
so he decidedly and wisely chose to stick to the channel i preferred.

that's the price parents pay for their children's attention, their favourite tv channel.

what about patricians?

2009-02-18T17:19:00.003+08:00

been meeting up with ben loh,
he keeps asking martin, dom, and even tarci

"EH WHO'S HAIR LONGER AH."

yours lah ben, yours.

"EH BUT WHO'S HAIR THICKER."

MATT'S LAH, LIKE A MOSS MOB WITH PUBIC HAIR.

then i tell him,

"BUT WHO'S STILL TALLER."

and he replies,

"FUCK YOU, BUT WHO GETS MORE GIRLS? I GET THE PUUUUUNANI."

that screwed up sonovabitch you.

talked to angelin about how fucked up hms is,
and how she admired patricians in hms, namely tarci and i.

"like how much of the rebels you all are, and yet successful?"

AHAHAHAHA SUCCESSFUL? WHAT ABOUT ME?

"well, you still made it into hms."
"coz i had a cousin from st pats too, and he turned out to be a total havoc."

I GUESS ITS TIME TO CHANGE THE WORLD-TIME.

k study-mode, ON.

slam crunk.

2009-02-18T13:47:00.003+08:00

Slam Crunk- Holiday Parade

High school she was the girl that
Made me do the hula hoop around the gym
(Used to get a pic again, she's a ten...)

In High school she was the girl that
Made me do the hula hoop around the gym
(Used to get a pic again, she's a ten.)

Never thought that she would go and
Work for the president, Mr. George Washington,
(Where my money at! )
She bawls and he calls

And I'ma tell you, like who told me,
Cash rules everything, around me.
Singin' dolla, dolla bill ya'll.
Dolla, dolla bill ya'll, yeah.

And I'ma tell you, like who told me,
Cash rules everything, around me.
Singin' dolla, dolla bill ya'll.
Dolla, dolla bill ya'll, yeah, oh, yeah.

I said I like big butts, and I cannot lie.
Ooh you otha brotha's can't deny.
That when a girl walks in with an itty bitty
Waist, and a round thing in your face you get
Sprung, you want to put on top because you
Noticed that butt was stuffed. D-d-d-deep in them jeans
She's wearin', oh I'm hooked and I can't stop starin'.

Oh baby, I wanna get with ya' and take
Your picture. And my homeboy's tried to warn me,
But that butt you got makes me so horny!

And I'ma tell you, like who told me,
Cash rules everything, around me.
Singin' dolla, dolla bill ya'll.
Dolla, dolla bill ya'll, yeah.

And I'ma tell you, like who told me,
Cash rules everything, around me.
Singin' dolla, dolla bill ya'll.
Dolla, dolla bill ya'll, yeah, oh, yeah, yeah.

I said now you crank that soulja boy,
Watch me crank and watch me roll.
Watch me crank that soulja boy,
I'm gonna supa man that hoe.
Watch me you, watch me you.
Watch me you, you go and you supersoak that hoe.

And I'ma tell you, like who told me,
Cash rules everything, around me.
Singin' dolla, dolla bill ya'll.
Dolla, dolla bill ya'll, yeah.

And I'ma tell you, like who told me,
Cash rules everything, around me.
Singin' dolla, dolla bill ya'll.
Dolla, dolla bill ya'll...

Dolla dolla dolla dolla bill
[Super man that hoe! ]
Dolla, dolla bill ya'll.
Dolla, dolla bill ya'll.

And I'ma tell you like who told me,
Cash rules everything around me.
Singin' dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Dolla dolla bill ya'll yeah.

have i thought you about juowi's earphones?
they are FUCKING LONG.
and fucking long as in,

REALLY FUCKING EXTREMELY CRAZILY UNNATURALLY SATANICALLY LONG.

"three meters xiolxzxzsxzs, buy from diaso two dollars!"
- chin juowi

he's so proud of it,
he even tied my hands with his earphones during the speech communication presentation. (yestheonethatipresentedoninnerbeauty)

though i still can type,

and write with it.

kay, let's see...
remainding photos to post,

our course boys playing pool, got bored of me just sitting there, so they turned to me for this photo.

billy hijacking my first black hoodie.
(VIV, NOW YOU KNOW!)

gay yong yong talking about...
what was he talking about again? shit.

me still trying to live with my tied bondage-ful hands.

met up with dom, ben, and martin the other day.

like two kiddos on the train, fighting each other in their games.

MIXED? ONLY? it confuses you. then where do cigarette butts go? paper? or plastic?

me and shahrul, probably the guai-est mentee one could ever have.

getting creative with my tempura udon.

OH YA AND CATECHISM CLASS STARTED YET ONCE MORE.

AND REMEMBER THAT WILD SEX PROGRAMME ON ANIMAL PLANET MARTIN TAN SCAMMED US ALL TO WATCH?
MY DAD FOUND IT ON THE NEWSPAPER AS WELL

GO HUMP YOUR POLAR BEAR/PRAYING MANTIS/CHIMPANZEE/FOX LAH.

Sheyla Hershey

2009-02-10T09:20:00.001+08:00

before you read this post,
read this article:
http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/health/how-far-would-you-go-literally-for-cosmetic-surgery-364454/;_ylt=AjplCrfJwUQ.wxER2WoncZFabqU5

cheryl was just showing it to me during poa class,
WTF? A GALLON OF SILICON IN HER TITS?
34FFF IS LIKE
THIRTH-FOUR! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!
or
Final Fantasy Fuck XXXIV

cheryl you horny fuck.

wine red.

2009-02-10T08:48:00.002+08:00

yesterday i had my impromtu speech,
what was my topic about?
"BEAUTY IS MORE THAN SKIN DEEP."

this is what i wrote on the board before my speech,

"Death, not beauty, is in the eye of the beholder.
go ask my classmates what i said. :D

went drinking with tarci after school,
he had to emo about synposium,
i had to emo about the retreat.

i was told by lynn fong that i would have a 2% deduction.
for all my modules.
including hers.
and stats.
and social and environmental studies.

went to denise (yes, the name of the shop is denise, like my sister.)
bought red wine,
and just sat there like it was forever.

wine didn't go on an empty stomach, right?
SO WE BOUGHT ROTI PRATA.

watcha know, our very own eucharist!
THE BREAD OF LIFE,
AND CUP OF JOY.
(wait what happened to the breath of christ? AHAHAHAHA)yeah.

non-self-serving bias?

2009-02-05T00:35:00.002+08:00

now i finally know.

both sides of the family knowing my BIG secret,

viv's plans in avoiding trouble at home,

the dissolving of paganini,

ben chew's transfer to business & accountancy,

juowi's hatred for patricians,

tarci's feelings towards his course mates,

dom unable to seperate heart from mind,

the failure of the recent synposium project,

fiona having problems as a mediator,

sharr facing difficulty with disorders,

angie getting over-stretched emo over school/work,

shaun quitting strings,

jason getting together with sandra,

catechism kiddos straying off from church,

my sister not wanting to go to work,

my mum not even LIKING work,

my dad getting fucked by other family members for not raising me "as planned" to be,

it was all my fucking fault, i wasn't there for anybody at all.
someone fucking kill me.
matt's fucking gone.
its time to start this secret life on my own.

These are the nights.

2009-02-04T09:05:00.002+08:00

These Are The Nights- Making April

Our bodies to hand with the Jersey shoreline
Connecting the tide to the sand that was dry
And we both laid entwined, stared at the night
Clouds overhead, but that was all right
Cause then and there with the wind in your hair
Heaven was jealous to merely look fair against you
And all I need now is for this moon to keep light in its desolate skyline for good

Cause these are the nights that you know when youre there
You couldnt have planned it much better I swear and you hope
That your senses arent failing you now, but theyre slipping away

So divine is this happening
Cant I just graze your skin
For the rest of our time
But time isnt letting this night go on
Till then and there, the wind in your hair
Nothing in this world could keep me from staring at you
And all I need now is for that sun to stay under its glowing horizon for good, whoaoaoa

Cause these are the nights that you know when youre there
You couldnt have planned it much better I swear and you hope
That your senses arent failing you now
And you think to yourself now I could be wrong
But I might have just stolen this scene from a song and you know
That your senses arent failing you now

You could get lost in a night like this
So empty your thoughts and open your heart to the bliss

These are the nights that you know when youre there
You couldnt have planned it much better I swear and you hope
That your senses arent failing you now
And you think to yourself now I could be wrong
But I might have just stolen this scene from a song and you know
That your senses arent failing you now

Cause these are the nights, these are the nights
These are the nights, these are the nights

LT45

2009-02-04T08:49:00.004+08:00

i'm early for school.

AGAIN.

FUCKING AGAIN.

"well you know matt! always either very early, or he doesn't turn up at all! AHAHAHAHAHA!"

ahahaha YOURSELF YOU SHITBRAINS.

took me forever to find stupid lt45

"you know the last time we had the yep sharing shit there? how could you foget?"

"aiya the engineering block there lah, super ulu one. btw thanks for waking me up by calling me. else i oversleept."

NAH ITS ALRIGHT, YOU CAN FUCKING GO BACK TO SLEEP SHAUN/JUOWI.

LIKE CAN YOU EVEN FUCKING TELL ITS HERE?
its FUCKING medieval lah.

wow and a pcs girl just walked passed.
waved, but she just ignored me.

best day of my life i'm having.

*edit:
oh ya, and here's a photo of me trying to burn marshmellows for leland to smoke.

i'm FUCKING BLACKMAILING YOU YOU BASTARD.
ASK YOU COME NGEE ANN SUFFER WITH ME IN THIS HELLHOLE DON'T WANT.

see lah, end up in ulu jc,
who's to blame?

AHAHAHAHAHAHA I'M SUCH AN ASSHOLE.

the poa teacher.

2009-02-03T12:00:00.002+08:00

The POA Teacher

Classroom environment, this story is told
A tale of woe, in bitter cold.
Lecturer teaching, no one listens,
No one cares, nobody's backbone she straightens.

Minds are for moulding,
Lessons are for sleeping.
Principles of Accounting,
Good for nothing.

In the macdonald-scented air
Feasting with fucking noisy mouths are made
Couldn't give two damns
To what she supposingly said,

"Moments of sharing" she so claims
As I hear the raindrops on the window panes.
"Do business in an ethical way.
Perserverence & hope,
Would help you get by your day
And in rough dark times cope."

"Do what is right, not easy."
That Harry Potter cheesy,
Spouse to an engineer,
Mother of a teen.
In the only right position she claims to be in.

Now here I am at home, today,
Still fucking deep in thought,
Of her "words of wisdom."
Away from my POA retest I stray
Saying i'm sick, and its my fault.
While I'm writing this out of fucking boredom.

if life is so perfect, why do roses have thorns?

2009-02-03T00:53:00.002+08:00

here's what i came across whilst surfing yahoo answers:

if life is so perfect, why do roses have thorns?

A protection for It's beauty.
(ya man, put thorns around your vagina for a start, motherfuck.)

Because there is no pleasure without pain.
(almost hornily cheesy, but still fail.)

Who told you life was perfect?

They were lying.
(my favourite answer, although corny.)

It is not perfect, but Jesus is. The way I see it we should be thankful that thorns have roses.
(the way i see it we should thank mr. religionist for giving up fucked up answers and wasting yahoo bandwidth space.)

TO STAB AND KILL YOU!
answer my question
LIFE SUCKS
(chillax, emo dude.)

schools/faculties

2009-01-28T08:22:00.004+08:00

Six Feet Under The Stars (Acoustic)- All Time Low

Time to lay claim to the evidence
Fingerprints sold me out
But our footprints washed away
From the docks downtown
It's been getting late for days
And I think myself deserving of a little time off
We can kick it here for hours
And just mouth off about the world
And how we know it's going straight to hell

Pass me another bottle, honey
The Jaeger's so sweet
But if it keeps you around, then I'm down

Meet me on Thames Street
I'll take you out
Though I'm hardly worth your time
In the cold, you look so fierce
But I'm warm enough
Because the tension's like a fire
We'll hit South Broadway in a matter of minutes
And like a bad movie, I'll drop a line
Fall in the grave I've been digging myself
But there's room for two
Six feet under the stars

I should have known better than to call you out
(On a night like this, a night like this)
If not for you, I know I'd tear this place to the ground
(But I'm all right like this, all right like this)
I'm gonna roll the dice
Before you sober up and get gone
I'm always in over my head

Thames Street
I'll take you out
Though I'm hardly worth your time
In the cold, you look so fierce
But I'm warm enough
Because the tension's like a fire
We'll hit South Broadway in a matter of minutes
And like a bad movie, I'll drop a line
Fall in the grave I've been digging myself
But there's room for two
Six feet under the stars

Time to lay claim to the evidence
Fingerprints sold me out
But our footprints washed away
I'm guilty, but I'm safe for one more day
Overdressed and underage
Do you really need see an ID?
This is embarrassing as hell
But I can cover for it so well
When we're six feet under the stars

Thames Street
I'll take you out
Though I'm hardly worth your time
In the cold you look so fierce
But I'm warm enough
Because the tension's like a fire
We'll hit South Broadway in a matter of minutes
And like a bad movie, I'll drop a line
Fall in the grave I've been digging myself
But there's room for two
Six feet under the stars
Six feet under the stars
Six feet under the stars

in school EARLY AGAIN.
walked outside school's front gate
you know where the posters of all the different schools and faculties are?
AND BOY DO I HAVE SOMETHING TO COMMENT ABOUT.

ITS THE FREAKING SAME AS COMMUNISM.

you get scammed by the open houses that poly is slack, poly is good, poly will give you an extra boost in your education if you suck too much to get into a jc,

BULLSHIT TO THAT.

just because teens these days are too darn confused into which faculty they should go into, all's the SAME. YOU'LL GET SCREWED UNDER.

NOTE: THIS IS BASED ON A BIASED SOURCE, A SCHOOL OF HUMANITIES STUDENT- ME.

"THAT'S WHERE ALL THE MONEY IS."
future jobscope: probably the best out of all the faculties, but never stress-free nonetheless.

"ENGINEERING IS GOOD. MORE TECHNICAL WORK YOU CAN APPLY IN YOUR JOB."
future jobscope: repairman.

"YOUR OLDER SISTER WENT TO MASS COMM, ALL FUN IN POLY AND WASTE TIME ONLY. LUCKY SHE GOT JOB IN SPH AS PART TIME."
future jobscope: probably the most colourful, but not as promising.

"COMPUTERS ARE GOOD. THE COMPUTER-AGE IS HERE! NEXT TIME EVEN WARS WILL BE FOUGHT BEHIND COMPUTER SCREENS."
future jobscope: wars fought behind computer screens ARE ALREADY HAPPENING. its called warcraft/frozen throne/countstrike/dota/final fantasy/halo/whathaveyounot.
probably can't see the rest of the posters, but i was lazy to take pictures of them anyway, coz the security guard might have thought i was some terrorist freak trying to plot a bombing in ngee ann. (wouldn't hurt if it was true anyway.)
HEALTHSCIENCE- HS
"MUMMY ALWAYS WANTED YOU TO BE A DOCTOR."
future jobscope: nurse.

HUMANITIES/HUMANS.
"DO SOMETHING MEANINGFUL, CHANGE THE WORLD."
future jobscope: social worker.

LIFE SCIENCES CHEMICAL TECHNOLOGY.
"LET'S DISCOVER A CURE FOR CANCER/AIDS."
future jobscope: test-tube cleaner/secondary school lab technican. please lah, we're all motherfuckers. fuckers that fuck MOTHER EARTH. she's created such diseases to get rid of pests like HUMAN BEINGS. we're born to die.

CET ACAMEDY:
"WTF IS THIS?"
future jobscope: i really don't know what's that.

INTERDISCIPLINARY STUDIES.
"someone to do to pass your time, life management skills, sports and wellness, contemporary issues, creative applied thinking skills, photography, history of rock and roll, enterprise."
future jobscope: ENDLESS. (or jobless.)

and every morning i have bryan to join me by the POND(PORN) at 56 watching his sarah connor/heroes/prison break.

its like all the time he's in a trance.
"BRYAN SAY I ROCK AND I'M ALL POWERFUL."

"you rock and you're power...."

and another thing i've learnt through chinese new year in watsons,
ITS FUCKING CROWDED.

and that's something you use to clean your vagina. from what i heard from my sister.

OKAY END OF RANDOM.

brazen bull.

2009-01-27T20:22:00.003+08:00

hope everybody's been having a OXpicious new year so far. :)
fell ill AGAIN, it feels so shitty that i always have frail health.

just something interesting everyone should read, something i happen to come across in whilst "random articling" on wiki, and since its the YEAR OF THE OX.

Brazen bull

Perillos of Athens, a brass-founder[1], proposed to Phalaris, the tyrant of Akragas, Sicily, the invention of a new means for executing criminals; accordingly, he cast a bull, made entirely of brass, hollow, with a door in the side. The condemned were shut in the bull and a fire was set under it, heating the metal until it became "yellow hot" and causing the person inside to roast to death. So that 'nothing unseemly might spoil his feasting', Phalaris commanded that the bull be designed in such a way that its smoke rose in spicy clouds of incense. The head of the ox was designed with a complex system of tubes and stops so that the prisoner's screams were converted into sounds like the bellowing of an infuriated bull. It is also said that when the bull was reopened, the scorched bones of the remains shone like jewels and were made into bracelets.[citation needed]

Phalaris commended the invention, and ordered its horn sound system to be tested by Perillos himself. When Perillos entered, he was immediately locked in, and the fire was set, so that Phalaris could hear the sound of his screams.

Before Perillos could die, Phalaris opened the door and took him away. Perillos believed he would receive a reward for his invention; instead, after freeing him from the bull, Phalaris threw him from the top of a hill, killing him. Phalaris himself is said to have been killed in the brazen bull when he was overthrown by Telemachus.

The Romans were recorded as having used this torture device to kill some Christian martyrs, notably Saint Eustace, who, according to Christian tradition, was roasted in a brazen bull with his wife and children by the Emperor Hadrian, and Saint Antipas, Bishop of Pergamum during the persecutions of Emperor Domitian, and the first martyr in Asia Minor, roasted to death in a brazen bull in c.92; his tomb became a site of miracles.

Another Christian martyr, Saint Pelagia of Tarsus, is said to have been burned in a brazen bull in 287 by the Emperor Diocletian.

The satirist Lucian, in the 2nd century A.D., is said to have given the first detailed description of the creation and use of the Brazen Bull.

The bull is mentioned in Dante's Inferno.[2]

go check it out. xD
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brazen_bull

because chinese new year is too fucking over-rated to remind you that just because they're older than you, it gives them an automatic default that they deserve more respect than you do from them.

chinese new year traditions

2009-01-25T23:09:00.002+08:00

mum- son, wanna accompany me? new year eve what, later you sleep you have longer life.

me- don't worry mum, not sleeping is what i'm adept at.

dad- we're all gonna die anyway. who wants to live forever and see everyone around you die.

makes me think.

juowi's impression of patricians.

2009-01-20T18:24:00.002+08:00

since i'm bored,
and need a break from all the project, i shall do a short post on juowi's impression of patricians.

before coming into ngee ann:
"all patricians are fuckers."

during first semester:
"wa matthew, if i didn't meet you, i would have thought that all patricians are fuckers."

after pao's birthday:
"all patricians are fuckers."

AHAHAHAHAHA AND THANKS FOR COMING UP WITH THE TERM BFWINY/best friend when i need you.

to the voice that says FUCK YOU to the people we love to hate,
all hail alma mater.

insane poa teacher.

2009-01-20T10:38:00.001+08:00

i dumb, like i'm talking to nobody.

was what she said.
she finally exploded.

morning taxis.

2009-01-20T08:36:00.004+08:00

my dad just sent the family car for reservicing.

RESERVICE WHAT?

he always complains
"AIYA, THIS CAR NO MORE POWER MANXSZXZSXSZXZXSZ I CANNOT VROOM THIS BMW LIKE I USED TO."

and when it comes back from servicing/reservicing he complains,
"THEY LIKE NEVER FUCKING DO ANYTHING TO MY CAR. JUST WANNA DRIVE FUCKING TELL ME LAH."

so anyway my dad's happy, somewhat, (i'll explain that later.)
because he doesn't have to run errands like fetch the whole fucking entire family from all four corners of singapore to our plastic pasir ris.

BUT WHEN IT COMES TO GOING TO WORK IN THE MORNING.

during secondary school when my dad used to send me,
and when he wasn't in town/overseas to send me to school,
and i was lazy to take the fucking bus 12,
my mum would always fetch me with the magical CAB
before heading down to work herself.

she would always FREAK OUT like a fucking wildebeest,
"MATTHEW HURRY BRUSH YOUR TEETH, I CALL THE CAB ALREADY AH. LATER AFTER SEVEN GOT SURCHARGE."

then always replay the call twice, just to remember the estimated time of arrival.

WAIT, STOP HERE.

QUESTIONS:
1. why the fuck do you wanna call for a cab when they're like so many fucking taxis just outside our condominium?
2. if you wanna rush just to beat the seven o clock surcharge, doesn't calling the cab defeats the purpose of siam-ing all extra cab charges?

ANSWER:
she is very GANCHIONG.

but i guess all that fucking tough training dragging me to st pats/ngee ann poly everyday has hardened her for this morning.
picture a conversation between my mum and dad outside our apartment after they called for the cab.

"where's the cab ah?"

"..."

"he purposely wanna come late ah, then after seven got surcharge."

"..."

"wa lau, i go call the operators."

"..."

"HELLO, WHERE'S MY CAB. I CALLED THROUGH MY HOUSE PHONE, HOW COME BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH, ETC... IF HE CANNOT MAKE IT HE SHOULDN'T TAKE THE CALL WHAT."

(it was then, my mum started to freak out together with my dad.)

"YOU MEAN THEY CANNOT MAKE IT?"

introducing my parents.

fuck off world.

2009-01-19T22:25:00.006+08:00

Kiss And Sell- The Maine

Another part with the same kids, another night with the same drinks
I need to find myself a new chick
I need to kiss a set of new lips

She's gotta be something new to me
Fresh face, someone new to please
So come on, come on girl, just you and me
Oh come on girl, just you and me

This kind of girl makes it rough (makin' it rough)
Holding our breaths while we touch
She won't kiss and tell, but this isn't hell
She got that name, it all seem like a game
How she is so well, I won't call this hell
If I had to guess, I'd say we have a mess you could sell

And how am I supposed to think, with her hand all over me
Telling me the right things, ever so distracting

She's gotta be something new to me
?
So come on, come on girl, just you and me
Oh come on girl, just you and me

This kind of girl makes it rough (makin' it rough)
Holding our breaths while we touch
She won't kiss and tell, but this isn't hell
She got that name, it all seem like a game
How she is so well, I won't call this hell
If I had to guess, I'd say we have a mess you could sell

She's makin' it harder, harder to breathe
I'm gettin' weaker, so pullin' the strings

The lights are all lost, there's no one around
We've both lost our minds, nowhere to be found
It's gettin' hot, I'm not saying this is hell
but I swear, this girl's a mess you could sell

She won't kiss and tell, but this isn't hell
She got that name, it all seem like a game
How she is so well, I won't call this hell
If I had to guess, I'd say we've got a mess you could sell

fuck off world.

for "adults" so wise, they know so little.

monday morning.

2009-01-19T12:37:00.002+08:00

monday morning.
school's fucked up.
managed to listen during poa for a bit though,
something about a rainbow vacuum cleaner and my poa teacher getting scammed.
and rest is all
"this is very important for your paper" material.
which i can only recall bits and pieces of lost information from class,
and the only thing i remember clearly,
is that unfortunate part that THAT part WAS "important."

another thing i don't get in this cursed school.
you know those japanese class people?
WHY THE FUCK DO THEY DO THIS TO THEMSELVES?
HOW DO THEY LIVE WITH THEMSELVES?

juowi's getting fucked up his partner who supposingly supposed to conspire with him a story in front of the teacher. and thus graded accordingly.

"matthew, tell me i'm fucked."

you're fucked.

"thank you."

oh and one more thing,
my sister's bragging about her job on how a part-timer like her in sph can get a coolio namecard:

it writes, Denise Han, Urban.
LIKE WTF'S URBRAN?
"you don't read newspaper one ah matt. its a section in the newspaper you fucking dickhead."

read?
WELL OF COURSE I LOVE TO READ.

ITS LIKE MY FUCKING MOST FAVOURITE THING TO DO.
(well, not almost completely.)

okay and my keyboard just spoilt on me.
okay gg,
because that's all i have left to blog,
i shall post one eff-ing hot photo of me during siva's gathering only to be destroyed by the awesomeness of dominic's sister's hat on my orgasmicly long and wavy hair.

FUCK YOU ALL.

IT LOOKS COOL OKAY.

prejudice & 8==D (( )

2009-01-19T03:34:00.007+08:00

just wrote finish my super late submitted e-learning article/post on prejudice.
here it is, and its all TRUE:

Examine the last time you were prejudiced towards someone from another ethnic group or the opposite sex.

I have always been against dark-skinned people and the elderly. It all began when I was in kindergarten/primary school. This story is too dumb to make up so thus very true. There was this once during my childhood, when I would always go down to my hdb's playground to do what normal kiddos do. Run around, cycle on my tricycle, try to hit on girls (yes, that's where my playboy talents emerged, during my childhood) in the playground, and of course last but not definately least, disturbing the adults. Or to use soft language, the MATURE FOLK. This flashback will forever be etched/engraved in my memory as until today it still haunts me.

One day, I was going down to my hdb's playground. But this day was different. All my neighbours, their parents, and siblings, were not there. All that was existent was this indian dude in his sixties, was sitting in the middle of the playground structure, stroking what seems to be a bigger version of his penis with a similar build. In simpler terms, he was playing with himself in the playground. Moaning whilst sitting on the cold of the metal of the playground and ambused by the cover and protection of the play house, I bravely but senselessly appraoched him.

"UNCLE, WHAT YOU DOING?"

Disturbed, the man turned to face me, and wordlessly went into a rage like some freaking caveman. With his sarong still on the floor, he stood up, chased me around the playground, and into the hdb carpark with what seemed to be a hammer that appeared out from his pocket. I left my tricycle in the playground, and tried endlessly to fool him with my directions running around cars when he finally grew tired of chasing me, and launched the hammer at me. He missed, smashing a window of a car in the process, setting its alarm on. I rushed up to my house, still leaving my tricycle at the playground and cried to my maid.

What do you think caused the prejudice?

I think it was because he was odd of skin-tone which is why I checked him out in the playground. And from that experience, I had this stigma that indian men are all perverts with no sense of decency. Because I had very little contact with my grandparents when I was young, I found them hard to understand, especially during the senile period of their lives. Another factor is due to my lack of understanding of the cultural race, therefore I "pre-judge" what I think is right about indians and the elderly. But mainly because of this incident that indicated a stigma that indian men are pervertic and the elderly are hard to understand and easy to anger, I had my prejudice against these two groups of people.

What do you think can be done to reduce it.

Since Singapore is already facing an ageing population, we should have more campaigns by the governments at least to have more self-awareness of the aged/senior citizens. Understanding them is indeed difficult, as a lot of patience is required. Putting myself in their shoes would also better help me understand the plight and challenges that these senior citizens face everyday. We should also start accepting people for who they are. If they're perverts, SO WHAT? Either deal with it, love it, or fix it. Racism cannot be completely gone, only significantly reduced. At most. There can never be "true racial harmony," only racial TOLERANCE.

"Everyone's a little bit racist, sometimes.- Avenue Q"

oh ya and from my porn talk, people still don't get
8==D (( )

you know,
8==D (( )

its a _____ with _____ that's about to ___________ a ______.
why two brackets on one side you ask?
its beside when sitting/lying down, the skin has FOLDS.

sigh, what a busy week ahead for me. with the ULTIMATE project still pending for wednesday, and lots of things to do, like our creative way of teaching how to use this thing called a GRID ANALYSIS (how to make decisions.)

we came to the topic on:
how to choose the right girlfriend for you.

Desperate girl
-it is the type of the girl who spend all her life laid out, looking for a perfect life, and suddenly she discover that she gets old and she doesn't get married yet because she hasn't met the perfect man for her
-she wants desperately to get married no matter who the guy is or what he does
-she is pressed by the time and is ready to marry with a jerk as long as he has marriage material
-watch out because if you marry one of this, you have to spend the rest of your life with her

Materialistic girl
-usually is good looking and well dressed
-is looking very well outside but inside it is a bunch of money hungry taker
-she is looking all the time after boys which are staying very well with their wallet
-she expects that a man should finance her entire life just because she is biologically female
-she is very friendly, nice at the beginning but after some time you'll see that no matter how much you give her, she wants more
-she is greed personified
-she is interested only in what she wants and not others feelings
-stay away from this kind of girl because she will dumped you after she spend all your money

Angry girl
-she is the type of the girl which sees life like a battle
-anything what is happening or is told to her is seen as a insult at her address
-has also a bad opinion about man, sees only the wrong sides of a man
-she is always upset and angry
-usually she likes to take out of context everything what is said to her and to interpret the words like she wants
-you don't have any future with her, she has a simmering anger at men which can explode at any moment

Insecure girl
-she is very nice and treats men very well
-but she suffers by frustration
-is wracked by anxiety about making the wrong decision
-she has to think twice about what to do, what to wear, where to go, what to eat
-she needs constant reassurance that she's attractive and worries incessantly

Stupid girl
-this type of girl likes to speak a lot but she doesn't say nothing smart
-she likes to say always gossips about the others, but when you want to talk something important with her, she is not able to make conversation

Uptown girl
-she is very rich
-everything she has is better than yours and she wants to make sure that you know it
-she only dates the best of best
-is entirely focused on herself
-she is very selfish, self-indulgent grown up as '' daddy's little girl''
-needs to be constant center of attention no matter what she does or where she goes

Childish girl
-everything in life hurts this kind of girl
-is the type of girl who cries a lot, every innocent comment or criticism will upset her
-avoid this kind of girl because if you are dating one you will have to spend all the time apologizing even if you didn't make any mistake
-avoid also long term relationship with her because she is capable of suicide if you want to leave her and all the blame will be thrown on yourself

Elusive girl
-is the type of girl who is afraid to start a relationship
-she might be hurt in a past relationship and so subconsciously avoids or sabotages new relationships in the present
-she look interested at the beginning but after a while she runs away
-is the type of girl who likes to send mixed messages so you'll never understand her

Talking girl
-it is a big difference between somebody who is able to make good conversation and have sense of humor , and somebody who always have to make a comment about everything
-it is the type which is very hard to please and always has to say something about everything is happening or speaking around her

Romantic girl
-this lives in her own world, of movies and romance novels
-she is very dreamy, imagining things, expecting Prince Charming to come after her
-she doesn't know how the real world is
-she was grown with the idea that she is a princess

Dragger girl
-this kind of girl will always make you feel bad even there is no reason to feel that
-it is always worrying and she can never be happy, everything around her is a total drag
-even if a wonderful thing happen to you, she will make you feel like it was the worst thing that could happen ever

Controlling girl
-she likes to have the total control in your relationship and on you too
-wants to control you in everything you do, you wear or eat
-if you try to control her too, she will get angry, cry, scream or use any deceptive female tactic until you give up

Flirting girl
-she flirts with anybody and flaunt her sexuality at every opportunity
-has a big power of attraction
-exist the risk to dump you in any moment if somebody better comes along

something found and thought of by sheng ming, the only known cats class dude known for being loud besides me. god bless both of us. fuck y'all cold and quiet people. so bloody conservative. take come chances, get into accidents.

"wa lau, all you maris stella people everytime play mother lor."

"shut the fuck up lah, your mother no pussy."

"better than your mother right? her pussy is carve out one even got fungus and mushroom growing."

"no lor your mother only got dick."

"fuck you lah my mother the dick at least strap-on one but your mother's dick sewn on lah."

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MADE MY DAY LAH YOU BULLSHITING MOTHERFUCKER BOY SCHOOLER.

back to the progress on my smoking,

ITS BEEN MORE THAN A WEEK!

WOOHOO.

just had a flashback of martin tan's inital idea when i smoked my last cigarette:

"matt, i have something you can try, but it'll be damn dangerous."

"what?"

"you overdose yourself in cigarettes and keep smoking like siao. drown in smoke until you get so sian of smoking, you'll eventually quit."

"oh, i tried that."

"how did it go?"

"damn shiok."

"okay fuck, time for plan B. go on cold turkey. quit now."

THANK Y'ALL BITCHES/GAYWHORES.

entertainment or epidemic?

2009-01-15T06:17:00.006+08:00

Jasey Rae (Acoustic)- All Time Low

Lights out,
I still hear the rain,
These images that fill my head,
Now keep my fingers from making mistakes,
Tell my voice what it takes,
To speak up,
Speak up,
And keep my conscience clean when I wake.

Don't make this easy,
I want you to mean it,
Jasey. (say you'll mean it)
You're dressed to kill,
I'm calling you out, (don't waste your time on me)

Now there's an aching in my back;
A stabbing pain that says I lack,
The common sense and confidence,
To bring an end to promises,
That I make in times of desperate conversation,
Hoping my night could be better than this in the end.
Just say when.

Don't make this easy,
I want you to mean it,
Jasey. (say you'll mean it)
You're dressed to kill,
I'm calling you out, (don't waste your time on me)

I've never told a lie,
And that makes me a liar,
I've never made a bet,
But we gamble in desire,
I've never lit a match,
With intent to start a fire,
But recently the flames,
Are getting out of control.
Call me a name,
Kill me with words,
Forget about me,
It's what I deserve,
I was your chance,
To get out of this town,
But I ditched the car,
And left you to,

Wait outside,
I hope the air will serve to remind you,
That my heart is as cold as the clouds of your breath,
And my words are as timed as the beating in my chest.

first time i'm awake first in the whole han residence.
probably because i
just woke up from what seemed to be a very shiok slumber.

all that remains in my memories the last time i was awake was about the solo porn speech presentation i gave to the other class yesterday.

oh man, i'm gonna smash my skull into street lamp posts until i forget what i just polluted my course people with so effortlessly.

facebook comments about my porn talk

"matthew is about to spread the world in darkness."

mike sung: AMEN.

billy: it will forever be in etched in our memories.

and some interesting stuff i found whilst RESEARCHING on my topic:

the san fernando valley
porn capital in the world

internet porn

there are an estimated 372 million porn web pages.

12% of all websites are pornographic

25% of all search engines requests are pornographic.

35% of all internet downloads are pornographic in nature.

every second, 28,258 internet users are viewing pornography.

every second, $89 is spent on internet pornography.

every day, 266 new porn sites appear on the internet.

"sex" is the most searched word on the internet.

U.S. revenue from internet porn in 2006: $2.84 billion.

72% of internet porn users are men.

28% are women.

70% of internet porn traffic occurs during the 9-5 workday.

3% produced by the UK.

4% produced by Germany.

89% produced by the US.

most trafficked adult website: www.adultfriendfinder.com

countries that ban pornography:
saudi arabia
iran
bahrain
egypt
UAE
kuwait
malaysia
indonesia
kenya
india
cuba
china
singapore

most visited websites (daily):
#1 MSN.com: 220 million visits
#4 Youtube.com: 196 million visits
#49 AdultFriendFinder.com: 7.2 million visits
#145 NYTimes.com: 4.1 million visits

sorry viv, i didn't use your upgrade/ms popular kamasutra photos, had to take one on my own, their love-making seemed so... superfical. LOL. (not trying to sound biased to your phototaking skills of toy sex to the best of my commentating abilities. xD)

this one seemed best. but i just don't like you blue.

what's with the head? kthxbye.

imagine fucking a cat who's reading a comic book. result: this.

rape, not sex.

another one i ALMOST put in, but i thought to myself, how's ms popular gonna get back on her feet after intercourse? FAIL.

this my fellow porn-addicts,
this.
is.
ART.

WHAT? IT WAS 2AM AT NIGHT AND I DIDN'T HAVE A PROPER POWERPOINT SLIDE VISUAL AID.
WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO? GO AND SEARCH FOR ACTUAL PORN AND GET MY ASSES F-ED BY LYNN FONG? (f-ed as in, FAIL. fuck you horny bastards.)

the perfection of this masterpiece, it has minimal whitespace, no hands(although sexual participant on the left is a handpuppet, try finding my hand), and...

IS DONE ON MY LAPTOP.
kinkiest place to ever have sex for a toy, aye?

okay fine this post is rubbish,

fuckyoualldenseunappreciativeminkfucksbye.

corny love quotes.

2009-01-13T01:21:00.010+08:00

In Fact- Gregory And The Hawk

Step one: light me on fire
step two: walk clean away
I wont burn long
and evidence of your done wrong will be gone
in seconds I swear
but if you got time anyway
why not watch me hurt
and nothing is sweeter than needed revenge
oh that's right
I did nothing
and you were the mean one
in fact, you even broke my good tape deck
in fact, don't wanna be friends

but if you got time anyway
why not watch me hurt
and nothing is sweeter than needed revenge
oh that's right
I did nothing
and you were the mean one
in fact, you even broke my good tape deck
in fact, don't wanna be friends

i've been surfing on the internet these days,
and whenever you surf, you CAN'T help but run into one of these,

THOSE FUCKING CORNY LOVE/PICTURE QUOTE THINGIES.
and guess where i got this webhosted from?
from this photobucket user: VODKA_ICE86
86 assuming she was born on 1986, making her...
23 this year?
GOOD GOD.
WHY ARE 23 YEAR OLD AMERICAN GIRLS UPLOADING BULLSHIT ON THEIR PHOTOBUCKET?

here's another one i saw,

LIKE WTF?
i mean i just got on my smoking-quitting thing, but WHAT?
how about, i'm like cigarettes,
easy to access to,
but not CHEAP.
see? its all about marketing. not CHEAP sounds a little nicer than EXPENSIVE.
AHHHHH I JUST CAN'T STAND THIS DUMB BITCHES ALL SO OVER-OBSESSED WITH THIS CYNICAL THING CALLED LOVE.

and something i found on hazm's blog, sorry if you think i'm stalking you, i just happened to have your link from sherry's blog, who supposingly tagged on my board, let see it,

wtf is this now, some kinda science freakshow?
showed that to fio, she told me,
"i'd probably freak."
well, i'd probably laugh in guilty pleasure and tape the rest down for the entire community of youtube to laugh on for all eternity.

NEXT.

yup, a little something like religion. you worship this invisible man that supposingly watches over EVERYBODY. unless of course people fight over each other because they won't worship the same invisible man.

ARGH, I'VE HAD IT.

AND WHAT'S WITH PEOPLE TRYING TO LINK LOVE WITH BEING EMO. WTF?
if people just love being alone,
it doesn't make them emo, right?
and what does it have to do with love?

i'm not even gonna bother to understand this one. NEXT ONE PLEASE.

frankly speaking, i'm short. BUT THAT DIDN'T MEAN THAT I DIDN'T WANNA APPRECIATE THIS. i tried my best. but nope, just no. guys tip-toe-ing to reach some random mutated freak-of-nature tropical fruit which is coming from some tree that's exactly the same colour and shading as you and your girl and all that's around you? i don't thing so. almost reminds me as though its the fruit from the tree of wisdom, being the only coloured thing in the whole godammed picture THE FRUIT. FUCK YOU MOTHERFUCKERS.

why am i even posting this pieces of shit on my blog!??!?! i'm too tired to rant, so figure this out yourself.

sometimes they say indecisiveness is the key to flexibility.

out of bordom and stress, i went into researching this, SUBJECTIVE topic.
and only to my most trusted website of all the whole universe, i found something i had to agree on, something so powerfully wrong and misjudging that i never would have even come out with a base foundation of even imagining the thought of it, EYE BEAMS.

i just LOVE uncyclopedia.

soft language

2009-01-12T15:53:00.003+08:00

things have different names, especially in the british/american or asian/angmoh dysfunctional languages.

for example my sister told me once she went to her school canteen in her aussie uni and she asked the canteen aunty for some CHILLI SAUCE.

"i'm sorry? we've only got ketchup and hot sauce."

being a social worker/psychologist is also tough, you don't wanna offend people you're trying to help, so you keep BULLSHITTING them by using "less offensive" language.

i remembered lynn fong telling shaun's group for their very first project,
you know the documentary on your various social enterprises?
they were gonna do it on 18 chefs, a restaurant in simei run by ex-convicts.

"NONONONONONO YOU CANNOT SAY EX-CONVICTS, MUST USE THE TERM EX-OFFENDERS."

godammit.

to me and my sister wanting a car when i reach 18,
used cars are now called PREVIOUS USED TRANSPORTATION.

so i'm trying out this "soft language" to blog right now, just not to offend anyone/make them feel better.

yesterday i went to a WELLNESS CENTRE (clinic) to consult (see) a healthcare delivery professional. (doctor)

and the medical practitioner (doctor again) said i was suffering from occassional irregularity (constipation) and respiratory complications. (asthma)

and this people actually get bullshitted by this system into believing such shit.
fat, grown-ass, rich, powerful, well-off, happy people have invented this language to conseal poverty in every way possible and its disgusting to see how followers are beginning to agree in this ignorance of the need of help in the world.

and psychologists are actually calling ugly people the people with
SEVERE APPEARANCE DEFICITS.

in airports they PRE-BOARD passengers with children and "those passengers in need of special assistance." (crippled)

I MEAN COME ON, EVEN THE BIBLE USES THAT TERM,
JESUS HEALS THE CRIPPLED MAN.
NOBODY GETS OFFEDNED, RIGHT? STOP BLINDING THEM FROM THE FUCKING TRUTH.

deaf people- hearing impaired.
blind people- partially-sighted/visually-impaired/colour-impaired.
stupid people- learning disorder/learning disability/dyslexic/minimally exceptional.

another very well-used one is that
they get rid of all the old people in the entire planet and exile them,
after that they ship in these:
SENIOR CITIZENS.
like the time viv talked to ms siva on how YOUNG she was.
MOTHERFUCKING HELL YOU'RE LIKE USING A FUCKING ANTONYM TO DESCRIBE YOURSELF.

well, doesn't work for people in singapore anymore because of their fear of death,
they don't really DIE anymore.

we all just...

PASS AWAY.

found me.

2009-01-12T02:22:00.002+08:00

been realising that i've got a lot of dark energy around my recent posts ever since i entered poly, went reading through my post history, and this is what i found:

Trying to strain her voice
Across all that loud noise
Sleepy heads are on desks
Is the sun rising from west?

Snobbish people from the band
Skipping classes as and when
Teacher shouting teacher screaming
Attempting to teach, never succeeding

Why can’t Students make this school a better place?
What’s so interesting in making life in school a waste?
Teach less, learn more
Fail the “O” s? Encore!

Fighting bastards, smoking jerks,
Vandalising walls and tables, displaying their works..
Don’t expect to get some short of high-class degree
Especially if you are in the slacker school , opposite KC

Sleeping in lectures, chatting in class
When you’re having fun, time flies so fast
Unusual places: Siglap Centre , Block 57
Either ways both got 7-11

Raising funds to air-condition the school hall
Its our last year , what the hell is that for?
And for buying more air rifles and repainting the school chapel we are told,
Hallelujah , lock and load

Satanic black magic, demonology
It’s just an attention-seeking conspiracy
Juicy gossip, stories all fake
People are bitching ,”It’s WICKED SICK!!”

Duel monsters and cellphone pokemon
The Barney rustle, the western lawn
Trends begin, like those stupid cards
Trends and, the same way as they start

And transformers, that insane movie craze
Has got students dismantling their pens, accidentally inking their face
Or talking about the order, and boy that lived, and his quest
Harry's cursed scar, and Hermione the smoking princess?

Defiant when we are restricted,
Our freedom is gone when we are protected.
As Students, courage is the key,
Fighting for freedom, dying to be free.

AHAHAHAHAHAHA MATTHEW HAN USED TO BE THAT DEEP MUCH WHEN HE WAS IN SECONDARY SCHOOL AYE? AND YES, I RESPECTED SMOKERS THEN.

WOOHOO I GUESS I FOUND ONE STEP INTO FINDING THE OLD ME AGAIN.

CRAPPY POETRY!
look how you've grown, it's etched in skin and bone.
dressed up in make-up, and bleached out in the roses.

that's hollow.

matt kicks butt.

2009-01-12T01:12:00.010+08:00

well, if you know me well enough, you've probably know i smoke.
and if you don't, WELL, GOOD FOR YOU TO KNOW.
but recently things have been going on,
things self-preceived as favourable omens.

its offical, i'm quitting.

its day 3 since i last touched my last cigarette butt
but i remembered smoking it so clearly,
underneath martin tan's house,
him telling me,
"eh you got two sticks left. i help you break one lah, then you quit faster."

"yeah sure, go ahead."

"don't want lah, later you kill me."

you know what happened in the end?
i put one in my mouth, and threw away the box with the remainding cigarette.
not as noble as quitting straightaway on the spot i know but yeah.

"well, at least i'm gonna have a rich friend now in future, congrats for regaining your EX-position as one of my richest friends matthew han."

and i kept telling everyone the news, it made me feel better deep inside, but why?
was it because it was the right thing to do?
was it because i would be labelled number one underdog hero?

and it was moments ago i truly found out the reason,
its because when i tell them,
and i happen to pick up smoking again,
it won't be just myself i'll be letting down, (ah heck, i let myself down everyday all the time, 25 hours a day, 8 days a week.)

but i'll be letting those around me, feel the pain too.

including poor zhi qiang and his imaginary partner i so pain-stakingly asked him to make out with in the hms open house room.

like what tarci would always say when i tell him,
"fuck you lah tarci, no matter how hard i try to keep up with you in drinking ah, you always beat me by THIS LITTLE BIT. and you're not even trying."

"matt, its just the same with smoking also lah. no matter how much/fast/hard i try to smoke, you also always win me one. AHAHAHAHA."

had open house yesterday, i was on my "normal" mode, because i happened to have sudden breathing difficulties. (oh how delicate and fragile this scrawny matthew is.)
especially the saikang work of carrying stuff. ZOMFG.
"eh the boys, can you make yourselves more useful by helping us carry this?"
"except you, small kid."

excused, AGAIN.

and see how sp and np always compare themselves against each other. even when it comes to water bottles distributed in open houses.

just went to see the venerians after that, well, almost a third of them.
one was still the playboy he is,
the next was an alex kaneko look-a-like. (GO YOUTUBE HIM. best cover of "you & me" by lifehouse so far)
and the last one, outgoingly gay.

seems like nothing's changed, but me.

meeting them again somehow gave me the responsibility again to entertain my juniors.
making me feel more ME.

realised in the train i couldn't breathe again.
dominic got freaked out that it was due to my cold turkey of sudden stoppage of cigarette intakes.
had an outbreak of fever which peaked at 39.7
every breath seemed so painful,
that i almost turned lazy to breathe.

so i went to the doctor, only after 24 hours later.
turned out it was not due to my quitting, but because I'VE SMOKED SO MUCH PREVIOUSLY.
AHAHAHAHAHA GOOD THING I STOPPED AYE?
(okay fine, bad joke.)

but nonetheless, i've turned to you guys, the online community for support into quitting smoking.

and when does matthew ever turn to unknown strangers for help?
when does matthew even turn to you for help before?

"son, why do you have so many cigarette boxes in your drawer?"

well mum, its a reminder.

a reminder that when you're not around,
when nobody else's around,
they're always there. like it or not.

and that was the final push, waiting almost six hours for you.

i guess its just me, and my tissue papers for the next two days of mc.

tarci's talk.

2009-01-04T23:58:00.004+08:00

Kiss Your Genre Goodbye- Select Start

Hey. are you ready for the new style in this scene?
Start some shit... don't admit you lurk your ex-boyfriends page
everyday of the week.

So smooth about it
pretend you're doing well
Obsessed about him
baby, you need him
baby, you kiss but never tell

Prepare for a letdown
we knew it all along
(so don't get me wrong)

Girls! You've got a way with words
and bridges you'd love to burn
you were the one for me

Boys! Please take this all to heart
she'll tear us all apart
You were the one for me
but i was wrong.

I've seen you shake and i've seen you get played
from bright green eyes
you're such a lush with a soft simple touch
who's not so bright...

So smooth about it
pretend you're doing well
Obsessed about him
baby, you need him
baby, you kiss but never tell

Girls! You've got a way with words
and bridges you'd love to burn
you were the one for me

Boys! Please take this all to heart
she'll tear us all apart
You were the one for me
but i was wrong.

"i have two friends, one who smokes a lot, and one who drinks a lot."

he says that as though its a burden to be their friend. then don't godammed give a fuck about your friends you motherfucking motherfucker.

_____ says:
http://health.asiaone.com/Health/Wellness%2B%2540%2BWork/Story/A1Story20081229-111128.html
_____ says:
matt
_____ says:
we got to fucking quit soon
_____ says:
yeah...
_____ says:
at leat i can get liver transplant
_____ says:
u can't get a lung transplant

i fucking hate you all.
every last stinking one of you.

lost at home.

2009-01-04T19:04:00.002+08:00

the whole family went for church coz i pangsehed them yesterday,
and they left me alone. (including the lisa, our maid. godammed catholics. LOL.)

went out for some fussball,

you know that table soccer thingy that they have in my condo's common area?
and yes, i got trashed by this 4 year old kiddo.

FROM NAT:
Whenever You Call, I Will Be There. says:
LOL.
Whenever You Call, I Will Be There. says:
fussball.
Whenever You Call, I Will Be There. says:
man you suck

I MEAN, IF I DIDN'T LET HER WIN,
that means she probably would have let,
which gives me NO ENTERTAINMENT TO FEED MY BORDOM.

walked around my condo FULLY for the first time
ever since i moved in,
and tried to find my way to my unti via the carpark,
and i got lost.

its like another dimension of existence there.

brilliant aye? i got lost in my own condo,
kinda describes what i am now in life, a failure.

getting lost at home,
i'm a natural genius.

youtube's symphonic band.

2009-01-04T00:26:00.002+08:00

was surfing around youtube,
when billy showed me this,
http://www.youtube.com/symphony
"HEY MATT, YOU SHOULD GO FOR THE AUDITIONS, YOU PLAY THE VIOLIN, RIGHT?

well, we discussed about the bean sprouts we couldn't understand on the chim music sheet, and how other youtubers send their videos for audition and came to the conclusion that such musical skill can only be attainable by:

living as a hermit in exile away from all your friends,
quitting school,
take our daily dosage of shaolin's secret musical steriods,
practice 25/8,
leave home for china's suziki's mass production of musical talent,
dump our imaginary girlfriends,
and have a large sum of money to waste life away on expenses

then we MIGHT have a chance of getting selected.

that's a BIG might.

well, unattainable dreams are the best kind.

changing me.

2009-01-02T04:24:00.002+08:00

this past year hasn't been like the last.
or the one before the last.
or any of those other years.
2008 turned out to be quite different.
less funny, less sensitive, less random.

when i told fifi that she went,
"nah, maybe this year's just not a good year for you."

and when i asked amanda if i changed she told me,
"no lah you're still random. its just not as random as last time. SENSITIVE? YOU THINK NEW URBAN MALE AH. i remember one time you kept shouting some random number for no apparent reason."

sigh, i need FRIEND friends.

sharr's facebook joke.

2008-12-26T00:46:00.002+08:00

you know why santa is so happy everytime its christmas?

coz he knows where all the BAD GIRLS are.

muderous rampage.

2008-12-23T22:12:00.000+08:00

i hope you die.

i swear i'm gonna go on a murderous rampage.

alone.

2008-12-23T08:45:00.009+08:00

You All Believe- Danger Radio

Everything you thought you wanted
everything you thought you need
came along and brought you down
and now you're left alone crying
They always seem to say
the sweetest things

Finally he made it clear,
Finally she made her move
Focus now, don't give up hope
there's always something you can do
to make it through,
you've got so much to prove

Foolish girl don't waste your energy,
don't waste integrity
He's not worth anything
Foolish boy don't waste your dollar bills,
She'll be gone by tomorrow
Start up with the sorrow

You all believe, you all believe
that love is gonna save us
but nothing good comes from it, trust me
You all believe, you all believe
that love is coming to you
but it's your death you'll finally see

Pull you up a little higher,
make the fall much more severe
Now you're waiting at the bottom bleeding
and no one appears to save you,
cause your fate seems so surreal

Foolish girl don't waste your energy,
don't waste integrity
He's not worth anything
Foolish boy don't waste your dollar bills,
she'll be gone by tomorrow
Start up with the sorrow

You all believe, you all believe
that love is gonna save us
but nothing good comes from it, trust me
You all believe, you all believe
that love is coming to you,
but it's your death you'll finally see

You all believe, you all believe
that love is gonna save us
but nothing good comes from it, trust me
You all believe, you all believe
that love is coming to you
but it's your death you'll finally see

Now let me tell you a little something about love:
all you people giving yourselves up to it,
all you people giving into your hearts

start up with the sorrow

You all believe, you all believe
that love is gonna save us
but nothing good comes from it, trust me
You all believe, you all believe
that love is coming to you
but it's your death you'll finally see

company has gotten skeptical these few days.
went for two bbqs in a week.
one for peer support,

ryan chong, awaiting his arriving into the CLUB.

and the peer mentors' bbq, lazy to upload the pics, they're on facebook.

viv with spastic fingernails to go well with pao's spastic pen.
note for slow people: its the COLOUR.

and i'm alone again, in school.
and is a boy from pasir ris doing in his clementi school on the other side of singapore at 8:52am you may ask?

writing this blogpost
reading up prophecies of the problems of tomorrow, today
preparing for overdued projects
worrying for his strings concert (yes, its this saturday.)

thinking of you.

okay maybe that last line was a bit too corny.
GODAMMIT.

psychotic brilliance.

2008-12-22T04:11:00.002+08:00

i fucking miss you.

i need someone to club me to death.
any takers?

random comments with ben loh on facebook.

2008-12-19T00:08:00.001+08:00

Ben Loh [WHAT WAS GOD THINKING WHEN HE MADE CREATURES LIKE YOU AND I?!] 35 minutes ago -

11 Comments Matthew Han at 11:35pm December 18
probably, "AHHH SHIT I FUCKED UP."

Ben Loh at 11:35pm December 18
yeah man, WHY WAS GOD THINKING WHEN HE MADE DICKS FOR USSSSS?!

Matthew Han at 11:45pm December 18
so that when two dudes in the future talk it'll go something like this:
dude 1: hey dude, what's up?
dude 2: my DICK?
dude 1: fuck off man.

Ben Loh at 11:46pm December 18
dude 3: i would like some of that.
dude 1: some of what?
dude 3: dude 2's dick.
dude 1 & 2: FUCK YOU!!!

Matthew Han at 11:47pm December 18
and why did god make women with vaginas then?

Marcus Chan at 11:59pm December 18
If not you put your dick where, you tell me?

Ben Loh at 12:00am December 19
matthew - its not that hard to think of such an idea. its just a hole, with a very scientific name. ta dah, i give you GOD!!

Ben Loh at 12:01am December 19
marcus - probably on your arm? hahahahahah like some chick we both know.

Matthew Han at 12:03am December 19
spare me the details.

Ben Loh at 12:05am December 19
matthew - its called the matt and ben loh talk we always had during the past PL meetings (:

Matthew Han at 12:07am December 19
how i wish i was in secondary school forever.
let's keep the fire going, tell me a joke.

how i missed st pats.

afternoon drinks.

2008-12-18T23:47:00.003+08:00

went drinking with pao, dom, viv, and tarci today at brewerkz.
kinda quiet though.
presenting, my voiceless art:

pao says, "i'm happy."

emo.

2008-12-18T00:59:00.002+08:00

i'm emo, don't disturb me.

why am i emo you ask? that's for me to know, and for you to FUCKING TAKE THE FUCKING INITIATIVE to ask me why. now be off, and let me be in my spoilt, pampered ways, for i be grumpy.

sex, drugs, and rock & roll.

2008-12-14T15:21:00.004+08:00

Existentialism On Prom Night

When the sun came up
We were sleeping in
Sunk inside our blankets
Sprawled across the bed
And we were dreaming

There are moments when

When I know it
And the world revolves around us
And we're keeping it
Keeping it all going
This delicate balance
Vulnerable, all knowing

(Sing like you think no one's listening)

You would kill for this
Just a little bit

Just a little bit

You would kill for this

(Sing like you think no one's listening)

You would kill for this
Just a little bit

Just a little bit

You would, you would

Sing me something soft
Sad and delicate
Or loud and out of key
Sing me anything

We're glad for what we've got
Done with what we've lost
Our whole lives laid out

Right in front of us

(Sing like you think no one's listening)

You would kill for this
Just a little bit

Just a little bit

You would, you would

(Sing like you think no one's listening)

You would kill for this
Just a little bit

Just a little bit

You would

Sing me something soft
Sad and delicate
Or loud and out of key
Sing me anything

just realised,
the only things i bought from philippines besides the rosaries are:
december's issue of fhm,
a local guitar brand,
and a pack of marlboro's reds original.

yup, the iconic equivalent of sex, drugs, and rock & roll.
btw for the gk people who was wondering who ronny is, ther he is:

yup, if you've been thinking that the only person you find talkable to in the team was him, it was probably him. not saying that the rest of the team ain't all cold.
off i go, to enjoy my imported goods.

Tarzan & Jane

2008-12-12T02:46:00.002+08:00

some random joke i came across, worth a read.

When Jane initially met Tarzan, she was attracted to him, and during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had sex.

"Tarzan not know sex," he replied.

Jane explained to him what sex was.

Tazan said, "Oh. Tarzan use hole in trunk of tree."

Horrified, she said, "Tarzan, you have it all wrong, but I will show you how to do it properly." She took off her clothes and lay down on the ground.

"Here," she said, "you must put it in here."

Tarzan removed his loincloth, showing Jane his considerable manhood, stepped closer, and then gave her a mighty kick right in the crotch.

Jane screamed in agony till kingdom come but eventually managed to gasp for air and screamed, "What did you do that for?"

He replied, "Tarzan check for bees first."

four days in philippines, a lifetime to remember.

2008-12-12T00:57:00.003+08:00

WOOHOO WHAT A WEEK!
went to philippines for a study trip with my course people, and it was abso-fucking-lutely, in-fucking-credibly, fan-fucking-tastically, orgasmic!

Day 1: the day of travels.
godma and the church clique was there to send me off,
she told me i didn't need my i/c or my ezlink card, so i passed it to her.

lynn fong and her hubby was there too. overheard their convseration in finally getting their own place to live in and how the trouble really starts when couples move in. OOPS. YOUR TYPICAL SINGAPOREAN COUPLE.

our flight number, don't stalk/hijack/bomb us.

here's meatleg/kay yong doing what he does best- sleeping.

the sexiest school ever. (for now.)

after we checked in. it was on timer, can't you see the sweat from me running to and fro from the camera into the photographic scene?

me making use of my final moments of internet, transferring all the porn i can to my iphone before its too late, shaun getting curious. and curiously, the lady beside me was playing neoepts too! (not the lady who was making out with her boyfriend/client/hubby, its on the other side.)

shaun raping my guitar.

shaun visiting the site i told him too, joshua joins in curiousity, juowi in supreme delightful satisfaction.

juowi trying to get his mc extension from the red doctor.

joshua getting his in-flight orgasm.

self-explainatory.

this month's issue of SMILE, the airplane tourist magazine thingy.

me trying to upskirt some random girl in the magazine.

not to mention downblouse.

juowi fails again.

landed in manilla, customs were damn LOOOOONG. me going on cold turkey, blowing my imaginary smoke rings.

kay yong still doing what he does best, juowi joining him in his ritual, and me measuring his tit-size.

kay yong trying to do his warm up excercise after waking up, and me trying to do my own warm up excercise from waking up.

going through the shoe scan in manilla.

the confused-fuck.

juowi raping my guitar.

me with my spastic fringe.

me finally being able to touch my own guitar for the first time coz everyone is sleepy from the flight from singapore to manilla. (note my studded belt and imagine how i got overkilled at the body checks.)

bad breath kills- brush.

this was taken when the plane was literally taking off.

"the problems of tomorrow, today."

epic epicenter.

landed again in silay-bacolod airport,
first stop, a 45776546875674563456 year old mansion in silay, home to a rich family who converted their old house as a tourist attraction.

mist effect came from the coldness of the aircon in the van and out to the humid philippine air.

us destroying the mirror.

the sunlight burning tang's face.

fuckingly old books on a fuckingly old bookshelf.

same fuckingly old books on the same fuckingly old bookshelf with a fuckingly different angle.

a circle family tree that was on a glass table. SPOT MY NAME? omg denise and clarissa are there. LOL.

arrival in bacolod. this photo was taken before the mansion thingy, so it should be up there earlier on, but oh well, heck it.

welcome to catholic-land, you sonovabitches.

the room of dolls, and broken toys. spooky.

creepy living room.
i'm even having chills right now as i'm blogging.

the grand piano in the living room. so worn out that it could crumble any moment. some of the strings in the piano are already snapped.

the basement.

seems like the previous owner of this house had a perverted taste.

a perverted taste for technology.

catholicism owns you.

art piece for sale, titled A WAY TO FORGET. the dude in the drawing is smoking/drinking. (DON'T SPEAK, LASALLE'S FRIENDS.)

yup, the owner was definately a deviant.

the basement. AGAIN.

no aircon = smoking area.

the name of the mansion. it is apparent i'm too pussy to read it for you, so do it yourself.

juowi keeping me in my hoodie.

after that we went to this grilled seafood place where we feasted on...
what did we even eat?
we couldn't tell, we just stuffed everything that looked like food into our barbaric mouths.

is a subliminal messsage.

all in a day's work. the garbage trucks in our course- me and juowi.

our camwhoring nature gets the better of us. notice the amount of emptied plates on the guys' side of the table.

our epic driver who is about to kidnap us.

then we finally arrived in the village, with the welcoming committee putting those flowery necklaces-thingy on our necks maciam PAP politicians do just that we didn't put on those on ourselves.

some dumbass must have taken this photo coz it was obviously out of focus.

red making himself feel at home, at home.

its not everyday you see your business lecturer do that.

or that.

see the door, couples for christ, emo suck. the ultimate oxymoron.

the village's resident truck.

and then came the children, with me dashing through with two umbrellas, mary poppins style.

and non-mary poppins style.

us shelthering the stubborn kiddos who don't wanna go home despite the rain.

Day 2: epic farming.

tired me from all the crunchy kids for breakfast.

caught red-handed.

us at the organic farm, harvesting the CORN(CRACK) for breakfast.

me the cocaine harvester.

passing the loot to my mafia members.

lasallians enjoying the fruits of their labour knowing their gonna get rich on all the weed they harvested.

joshua anticipating himself smoking the weed that he just picked up from the horseshit.

and then came the children again. meeting giles, my partner in crime.

together, we are, "ERECTION BOY AND EJACULATION MAN." i could seriously feel his prick throbbing at the back of my neck. that horny boy, him.

something happened after this pic, any guessers?

us with the sexiest people on earth, lasallians.

on short supply.

part of an album from a serial village rapist-cum-stalker's photographs.

something that completely made my day.

and we buy coco cigarettes. how about that?

chengxi, being himself.

i think i was just oblivious to the sleepy-aura around me.

nothing surprising here.

reached the other village, discovered it was flooded. so they opened GK WATER GAMES 2008.

street art- the voice of the people.

me getting fucked by the mud.

me transporting bricks that were so easily broken, as if they were made of horse semen.

the shovel just looked cool. unfortunately dumbass shaun didn't take the full length picture.

a random boy in jollibee making out with his own kind.

their mascot, jollibee, the son of lesbian dragons.

rosaries for sale, amen to that. for the dumbfucks who bought them and thought they were necklaces, fuck you. they're actually prayer beads you gulliable dooshbags.

splendid delicacy of a duck embriyo. i ate two of those, covering others who didn't wanna try.

digusted sheena and the underdeveloped duck-killers.

sheena totally freaking out at manwhore us.

we really ARE pigs.

good question.

luke, the guitar hero.

me discussing the choice of christmas carols with the guitar hero, and his disciple.

introducing, the committee of really bad singers.

Day 3: enlightenment.

juowi and joshua looking pissed off at what they see as they open their door. either they opened the door to the wrong dimension, or forgotten to shave their armpits that morning before having that picture taken.

NOW FOR A COMMERCIAL BREAK FROM ALL THAT PHOTOS. I PRESENT TO YOU, THE SLEEPING GOD.

vote red for president.

filippino porn.

its a bird! no, its a plane! no, its... JACKIE CHAN'S WORST NEMESIS- A RANDOM COCONUT-LIKE-SHAPED-FRUIT-PLANT-THINGY DROPPING FROM THE SKY!

one school, one classroom.

reverse the effects of masturbation- eat carrots.

me surveying the orgaSMic farmers.

the orgaSMic farmers surveying my survey.

basketball hoop while stocks last, child not included.

close your windows, shut your doors, david blaine is walking on the streets looking for gulliable dumbfucks to fool on national television.

i just love windows.

and he just loves armpits.

but ultimately, everybody loves camwhoring.

someone was pulling me away.

i was standing sideways on an invisible wall, spiderman-style.

hot red.

imagine carrying all of that though customs.

save us.

some dude was pulling my hair, i swear.

kiddos were pulling out legs from below.

my mob.

the family.

okay i'm done.
for now.

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean, I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."

Mariah Carey.

gone to GK.

2008-12-07T00:17:00.001+08:00

i'm in the airport now, 20 minutes from my flight.
will be coming back from the philippines wednesday midnight/thursday morning. anybody who wants anything from the philippines tell me on the tagboard, i'll try to check if i manage to get internet access there.

pray for me.

FAM.

2008-12-01T08:23:00.003+08:00

Same Damn Song- More Amor

Are you ready?

Day after day night after night
squeezing your eyes for somebody's lost empire
questioning old, questioning life
posting the bills for somebody's own desire
I'm taking the notes, and everyone knows
at the light of a match my whole world will catch fire
Now you're dancing alone
while im standing up here
and everyones singing the same damn song and it goes...
and i'm home...

I'm glad I must say that I'm enticed with this time
such a critical change to build my own empire
developing space on such positive waves
i'm taking those notes and i'm filling in blanks
discovering ease, recovering eyes
i'm blowing this smoke up
everyones asked why
now you're dancing alone
while im standing up here
and everyones singing the same damn song
and it goes...

I can honestly say I wasn't questioning my
decision to roll and create my own empire
desired to know what its like to be heard
all of these words there's just so many words
with such a beautiful day and such limitless time
I'll be blowing this smoke up
everyone's asked why

haven't been blogging last week because SOMEONE DIDN'T WANNA SEND ME THE PHOTOS.
can't blame her lah, always busy one. xD

random questions.

2008-11-30T01:10:00.004+08:00

random questions i did from someone's blog, bored since i have no PICTURES to blog about.

1.Do you have secrets?
how you tell that someone has come of age is when his/her favourite birthday present becomes a secret. YOU SICK FUCKS.

2. Would you fall in love with a girl older than you?
TOO LATE. :D (if you find me weird, YOU HAVEN'T MET TARCI.)

3. Do you enjoy going to school?
ngee ann poly, almost 40km away from home. its nice to come visit the west once in awhile as a pasir risian tourist. (keyword: ONCE IN A WHILE.)

4. What is your current interest/s?
pee-ing in the sink, advertising for porn, hair swooshing.

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?
Would you fall in love with a josephian/tall gayfuck from mjc who has a fetish for hitting people's chest/washingboard who plays the violin like crap/cartoon character/psychologist who smokes? I'd rather not.

6.Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
love's quite fucked up in modern context so... MOST BLESSED = NO LOVE.

7. Will you forgive the person who had played around with your feelings?
what an ah lian question, SKIP.

8. If the person you like knows you like her, what would be your reaction if she says he also likes you?
different question, same structure. NEXT.

9. Is there anything that made you extremely happy?
happy is the state in which people are in when Jesus walked the earth...despite all that killing and stuff. now everyone is a in a state of sub-happiness until Jesus makes another appearance.

10. What takes you down the fastest?
how about we change the question to "WHAT TAKES YOU UP THE FASTEST?" PORN!

11. How would you see yourself in 10 years time?
dead. in hell tuning satan's guitars for all eternity.

12. Who is currently the most important people to you?
people who can answer back the same question and include me as their answer.

13. What is/are the most important thing(s) in life?
sex, drugs, and rock and roll.
and youtube.

14. Would you rather be single and rich, married and poor?
WHAT? WHO THE HELL WANTS TO GET MARRIED WHEN THEY'RE POOR? AND WHO THE FUCK CAN STAY SINGLE IF THEY'RE RICH? how about... FUCKING AROUND WHEN YOU'RE RICH? THAT SOUNDS GREAT!

15. What is/are your favourite colour/s?
the alternative word for NIGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAA/extremely dark grey.

16. Would you give your all in a relationship?
all my what? (i like where my mind is going man. xD)

17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
threesomes are fun.

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing someone has done to you?
most of us can forgive and forget; we just don't want the other person to forget that we forgave. and if your friend does evil to you, say to him, ''i forgive you for what you did to me, but how can i forgive you for what you did to yourself?

19. Will you confess to the person you like/love?
girlfriends are for noobs who can't download porn.

20. 5 people to do this:
satan
meagan fox
some random ah lian from friendster
jesus christ
julian d. rotter

project revolution.

2008-11-28T01:41:00.001+08:00

everyone's going crazy over our project.

so i'll be afb-ing for a few days/weeks.

brb after my philippines trip.

insanity is our greatest weapon now.

monday blues.

2008-11-24T08:27:00.005+08:00

monday morning.
fucking monday blues.

godammit i'm early again, the only fucker waiting outside of the classroom.
unbeliable,
yet usual.
tutorial doesn't start till 30 more minutes.

mornings are a little different when my sister's around.
i wake up, go for my morning shower, AND WHAT DO I DISCOVER?

uncapped toothpaste,
yellow slime in the unflushed toilet bowl,
a generous lock of hair clumped up in the shower drainage.

guess its all a matter of adapting.
BUT SERIOUSLY.
i'm not being anal. its just that its so servere,

that the dried crust of toothpaste is like stuck to the cap,
and you're unable to cap it back again.
so much for mocking my shitting skills yesterday, sis.

go into the toilet,
you find all kinds of nonsense on the shelves.
but i guess i owe some of the "cleaning-up" credit to her too.
managed to have the remembering initiative of her to ask my mum to get more soap and shampoo.

*moves wavy long mane*
"DON'T I SMELL LIKE MY SISTER'S HAIR NOW?"

maybe its maybeline, maybe its not.

oh and did i mention i have been using this random girl's photo from friendster as my display picture in msn? and when someone asks:

"HEY MATT, WHO'S THAT GIRL."

i'll just try to mess with them and go,

"THAT'S ME WITH LONG HAIR. YOU SO LONG NEVER SEE ME ALREADY."

and here's an example of one of their reactions.

yes, that classic ben chew. always the victim of my pranks. xD

okay, finally in the classroom, just me and the teacher.
(DON'T THINK OF ANYTHING ELSE YOU HORNY BASTARDS.)
whoops, shawnald just came in.

and eugene just came in.

oh wells, back to work.
i mean, study.

magician han.

2008-11-24T01:27:00.004+08:00

30 Days- nevershoutnever

30 days till Christmas and I know
Is I'm not quite ready to let go of this past year
I have so much to show
One more month and all I need
Is a sign from you, that you think of me
If you don't, than please just say so
Cause all I do, is think of you

And it's wearing me out, it's wearing me down
This holiday, is nothing but frowns for me
But I've got a gift, you see
I'm making a list, hell, I'll check it twice
Of all the things you've done in my life
And I'll send it your way
So you see why I love you

Who would've thought that someone like me
Could've fallen in love so easily
I know that you know that I know what I want
I know I can't have it but give it a thought
I know that it sounds crazy, baby
But all I do is think of you

And it's wearing me out, it's wearing me down
This holiday, is nothing but frowns for me
But I've got a gift, you see
I'm making a list, hell, I'll check it twice
Of all the things you've done in my life
And I'll send it your way
So you see why I love...

Everything you through my way
I know it's hard to say, but it's a crying shame
That I came all this way, with so much to say
But all that came out was "happy holiday"
A home cooked meal and a nice warm bed
Somebody who love a place to lay my head
But I got 30 days and I'ma make them count
Cause I can't call it Christmas without someone to smile about

just went on a magic trick on webcam spree on msn.
those of my friends who saw me perform, I SO TOTALLY BLEW/BLASTED YOUR MIND YOU PUNY MOTHERFUCKERS, JUST ADMIT MY TRICKS WERE AWESOME.

an angie's eye view of my salutation.
godammit she keeps asking me to pose with that signature peace sign.

"AHAHAHA YOUR HAIR SOOOOO LONG, I'M SO GONNA MESS IT UP!!!"

oh noes, matthew han.
what the hell are you doing?
performing in front of the webcam in front of older women?
i have officially sold out myself.

SORRY LADIES, NO LAPDANCES TONIGHT.
THAT'S ONLY DURING THURSDAY NIGHTS, WHEN HAPPYHOUR IS ON.

fucking hell i feel like some whore now.

tried to open a coke bottle that has been submerged in the handidjaja's fridge for the past 365646745674576 weeks.

and i couldn't.

how did i open it?

my maid, as resourceful as ever, took a kitchen knife, and TADA, HOMEMADE COKE. (well, at least the opening parts of the coke are.)

and my sister's been bringing home weird cameras from australia. just played around with her polaroid. and that's me with the guitar hero controller, for you blind motherfuckers.

and my sister laughed horrendously insane coz she saw this in the toilet bowl:

note: not for the faint-hearted.

you really wanna see?

you really really really wanna see?

you silly motherfuckers, fine.

"WOW MATT, YOUR SHIT LOOKS LIKE ITS GROWN CLAWS/NAILS AND ITS BEEN STRUGGLING NOT TO FALL INTO THE ABYSS OF ITS TOILET BOWL DOOM."

my dad says its due to me not taking my veggies.

HELL FUCK NO.

oh shit, that means my shit is shittily unshittified.
oh shit, that means i still have flu.
oh shit, that means i'm unfit.
oh shit, that means i can't take my jab.
oh shit, that means i can't get immunized for shitty shit diseases.
oh shit, that means i can't go for the philippines trip.
oh shit, that means i cannot conduct my social experiment project there.
oh shit, that means i'll fail all my modules.
oh shit, that means i'm gonna drop out.
oh shit, that means more shit for me.

and to angie,
AHAHAHA JUST KIDDING LAH. I SECRETLY LOVE IT WHEN PEOPLE SAY I'M CUTE.
RAWR AHAHAHAHA ZOMFG I'M CRAZY.

and to prove that i haven't sold out yet, i still love hot girls.

more random shit.

2008-11-24T01:19:00.002+08:00

more photos of cya day, the jabbing incident, and more retarded epic gayness.

me and that FAMILIAR GUY during pcs(psychology and community services)/bzse(business and social enterprise) cya(compassionate youth in action) lecture thingy. we acknowledged each others' faces familiar, but just don't know where we've seen each other before.

my whole FUCKING course. (well, almost. minus the fun people. godammit.)

your gayness on his hot red iphone.

what the hell is this doing in my photobucket? oh wells, POST.

juowi left, ronny right. those fuckers trying to block outrageously orgasmically beautiful me.

this is why they wanted to retake. alison trying to look away beside me. we all know why. xD

me and ms tang, my course manager. juowi's shaky hands are due to over-masturbation. my bad.

just an old-fashioned photoshoot.

with the same old-fashioned poses.

that's about it.

for now.

jabbulation.

2008-11-23T15:24:00.003+08:00

this week was awesome.

with us wearing yellow hms(school of humanities/high musical school) tees for RED CAMP. (locate the pun in that sentence yourself.)

joshua showing me the correct answers for the poa e-test during red camp,

everyone behind me trying the remember the answers.

AND I GOT 40 OUT OF 40! WOOHOOO YEAH BITTTTTCCHES.

went to geylang yesterday to get my immunization jabs for the philippines trip for my project for stats and for social psychology for our good grades. LOL.

the uber cool doctor, i'll tell you why later.

julinda paying attention. (NOT.)

bryan emo of pricks, dr red with his signature shades, and halena the bukakae lady.

joshua with his piss-coloured-hair who is ckp-ingishly looking at bukakae lady, billy the best songwriter in the world who wrote the cover of the best song in the world waving his hands like the faggot he is, marcus, the undercover lasallian who's enjoying the view, the shaun, the owner of a pair of betraying eyelids.

things to bring, in case you guys might forget, just drop down on my blog, since y'all visit so often, CONVINIENT AYE?

me and my shaky fingers, fuck.

took our height and weight.
WOOHOO I'M PAST THE 1.7M BARRIER YOU MOTHERFUCKERS! I'M OFFICIALLY IN THE TALL CLIQUE. xD

the bunch of volunteers at the healthserve clinic,
(YES I KNOW, AND SHE'S KOREAN.)

okay, so why was that doctor uber cool?
took me for my check-up,
it turns out i had flu, and i couldn't take the jab because it might have side-effects.

AND SURPRISINGLY, one of the jabs are for the immunization of influenza/flu.
how fuckingly ironic.

and i was so mentality, needlely, fuckingly, prepared.

oh wells, gotta go back there on tuesday with isty, alison, i think.

end.

shitty juowi.

2008-11-23T02:45:00.002+08:00

here's juowi being shitty- literally.
CONTENT ADVISORY: WARNING! THE FOLLOWING CONTAINS EXPLICIT AND GRUESOME FOOTAGE OF OUR PERVERTED CUM-SUCKING LIVES. A MINORITY OF VIEWERS HAVE BEEN DIAGNOSED WITH SERVERE VOMITTING AND SPOILT SEX DRIVES. VIEWER DISCRETION IS ADVISED.

the things we do in poly.

almost reminds me of my old st pats days.

almost.

PEARLS.

2008-11-23T00:04:00.003+08:00

something random, i saw this on my school's portal, my cca records so far.

ngee ann polytechnic has this cca point system called PEARLS? or something?
where each letter of PEARLS stands for an area of cca you must develop in.

P- Participation
E- Enrichment
A- Achievement
R- Representation
L- Leadership
S- Service

WOOOHOO LOOKS LIKE I'M REEKING OF LEADERSHIP SUCKAAAXSXZSXZXZS.

apparently the commonly spammed area is usually the participation one? and the harder ones would be achievement and representation probably because you can't get everybody to win first place or the whole school to represent the erm... whole school.

end of random.

something cool i found again on deviantart. LOL.

Matthew the Magician.

2008-11-21T22:51:00.006+08:00

Boats And Birds- Gregory And The Hawk

If you be my star
I'll be your sky
you can hide underneath me and come out at night
when I turn jet black and you show off your light
I live to let you shine
I live to let you shine

but you can skyrocket away from me
and never come back if you find another galaxy
far from here with more room to fly
just leave me your stardust to remember you by

if you be my boat
I'll be your sea
a depth of pure blue just to probe curiosity
ebbing and flowing and pushed by a breeze
I live to make you free
I live to make you free

but you can set sail to the west if you want to
and past the horizon till I can't even see you
far from here where the beaches are wide
just leave me your wake to remember you by

if you be my star
I'll be your sky
you can hide underneath me and come out at night
when I turn jet black and you show off your light
I live to let you shine
I live to let you shine

but you can skyrocket away from me
and never come back if you find another galaxy
far from here with more room to fly
just leave me your stardust to remember you by
stardust to remember you by

ITS FINALLY ME E-LEARNING WEEK!
though i still have to go back to school just for magician training.

magic tricks to explain to secondary school kiddos what the school of humanities is?
met up with dom, viv, and pao for dinner a few days back,

and met viv and dom again two days after, same place. after my red camp. ZOMFG DOM'S LEG HAIR IS SO EPIC, SURPASSES THE LENGTH OF MINE.

been performing to red campers on what psychology and community service is, (LOVE THAT SMILE.)

do you believe i can read your mind?

siao, school never teach us that lah.

got, is just that you never pay attention and study hard enough lah matthew.

kkk prove me wrong, read our minds.

okay, but first i'll need a volunteer...

UPDATE:
my dad just stormed into my room 5 minutes ago complaining about his work boots.

"AND THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO CALL IT SAFETY BOOTS? TAKE A PICTURE OF IT SON, I COMPLAIN TO THEIR COMPANY. LATER MY FOOT KENA NAIL HOW."

super UPDATE UPDATE:
AHHHH FUCK, MY LECTURER PUT ME ON IVID FOR MY PERSUASIVE SPEECH ASSIGNMENT.

topic: persuade your audience that the loch ness monster IS real.
give it a look:
http://www.np.edu.sg/imc/ivid/player.aspx?vid=518

avenue q week.

2008-11-21T22:40:00.003+08:00

watched avenue q around 2 weeks ago with kenny and the lasalle centre clique.

kenny, our tour guide for the day in esplanade. xD

taken from the ceiling some in the esplanade.

me being more retarded.

been dinnering a lot with dom

and viv recently.

and badminton too.
and of course there's martin tan!

spastic tin tan and viv.
dom's been borrowing my camera for his elective module, so he's being my personal photographer these past few weeks,

just your ordinary artists in an original drama serial. :)

just a few days and he's come up with so many artsy fartsy shots of himself already!

and here's two shots i helped him for his assignment:

friends that bitch around after a bitchy day of work.

convince your friend to stop smoking

2008-11-11T15:00:00.005+08:00

Purpose- Avenue Q

Princeton:
Purpose.
It’s that little flame
That lights a fire
Under your ass.
Ha!
Purpose.
It keeps you going strong
Like a car with a full
Tank of gas.

Everyone else has a purpose,
So what’s mine?

Oh look.
Here’s a penny.
It’s from the year I was born.

It’s a sign!

Ha! Ba ba ba ba doo doo doo doo doo.

I don’t know how I know,
But I’m gonna find my purpose.
I don’t know where I’m gonna look,
But I’m gonna find my purpose.

Gotta find out.
Don’t wanna wait.
Got to make sure that my life will be great.
Gotta find my purpose.
Before it’s too late.

Ensemble:
He’s gonna find his purpose.

Princeton:
Whoa ooh oh.

Princeton and Ensemble:
I’m [He’s] gonna find my [his] purpose.

Ensemble:
He’s gonna find his purpose.

Princeton:
Yeaaah yeah yea.

Princeton and Ensemble:
I’m [He’s] gonna find my [his] purpose.

Princeton:
Could be far.
Could be near.
Could take a week
A month
A year
At a job.
Or smoking grass.
Ha!
Maybe at a pottery class.
Could it be?
Yes it could.
Something’s coming.
Something good.

I’m gonna find my purpose.
Yeah.

Ensemble: You’re gonna find your purpose.

Princeton:
Whoa ooh oh.
I’m gonna find it!

What will it be? Where will it be?
My purpose in life is a mystery.
Gotta find my purpose.
Gotta find me.

Ensemble:
You’re gonna find your purpose.

Princeton:
Whoa ooh oh.
I’m gonna find my purpose.

Ensemble:
Your’re gonna find your purpose.

Princeton:
Pur- pur- purpose
Yeah yeah.
I gotta find me!

today during poa prisca lost her voice, so we did our revision before tomorrow's test in silence. (in whichever way silence meant for bzse people.)
brought my violin out, to loan it to viv, needs her practice for evaluation this coming thursday! :D

today for class lynn fong taught us on persuasive speech. automatically got paired up with juowi who chose on the topic,

"convince your friend to stop smoking."

and i was obviously the opposition.

Health

Smoke when you're pregnant, it prepares the child for the world's pollution out there.
Passive smokers die first.
Smoking keeps your weight down compared to eating.
To avoid headaches in the day, always have a cigarette first thing in the morning to have the headache FIRST.

Environment

Children can use butts to decorate their sand castles.
Cigarette butts in flower pots and garden beds help fertilize plants and keeps the insects away.
You'll have a good reason to repain the ceilings every three years.

Social

Drug abuse helps you rearrange your thoughts and think rationally.
You spend time smoking instead of getting into trouble.
You'll always have a good excuse if you're caught loitering, "officer, i'm just having my cigarette."
Amuse your friends by blowing smoke rings in parties.
Why celebrate anti-smoking day once a year, when pro-smoking days are every other day?

Economic

Random forest fires caused by cigarette butts will keep the firefighters employed.
By buying cigarettes from mama stores, you can help retain the fabric of your society.
Smoking is a wise career move if you want an early retirement or use up your medical leave.

it was obvious who was the winner. too bad we didn't get selected to present though. we would have brought the house down. xD

another random joke i found when i was researching for the points of smoking:

In a School science class four worms were placed into four separate jars.

The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol.
The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke.
The third worm was put into a jar of sperm.
The fourth worm was put into a jar of soil.

After one day, these were the results:
The first worm in alcohol --- dead.
The second worm in cigarette smoke --- dead.
The third worm in sperm --- dead.
The fourth worm in soil --- alive.

So the science teacher asked the class --- "What can you learn from this experiment."

Little Johnny quickly raised his hand and said. "As long as you drink, smoke and have sex, you won't have worms."

sigh, what am i turning into.

influenza del freddo

2008-11-05T08:14:00.002+08:00

went for st ants yesterday again, watched more cheenapok movies,
all sucked.

except homerun, which i technically borrowed the vcd from my godma.
siva wasn't around to take care of the kids as she had some meeting on, so paolo came and took over. (instant-win. xD)

besides him there were joseph, viv, and jw. (no thanks to my bad influence.)

and i think i'm falling/fallen ill.
went to school, realised red's class was swapped with poa.
so we had a poa lecture instead. couldn't understand even a decimal of shit she was saying, as usual.

and everybody still goes, "OH MATT YOU TOOK POA RIGHT? MUST TEACH OKAY?"

yada yada yada

went for strings practice with viv, we sucked. as usual again.
i miss shaun's class.

dad went overseas to bangkok, in which both my mum and i didn't realise.
mum waited for dad outside her tcm school expecting dad to fetch her,
but NOPE,

i smsed my dad to fetch me from tampines after i got down the train,
but NOPE,

he just didn't come.
why? because we only remember him as our driver. apparently. LOL.

and i'm outside the classroom,
40 minutes early,
down with my flu of doom,
can't feel my mood slip away, bearly.

i quit.

2008-11-03T23:23:00.002+08:00

today i said something mean to someone,

"all along when people laughed at you, you thought you were the joker. but it seems that you finally realised you're the JOKE."

stereotypes.

2008-10-30T23:44:00.011+08:00

Swing Life Away- Rise Against

Am I loud and clear or am I breaking up?
Am I still your charm or am I just bad luck?
Are we getting closer or we just getting more lost?
I'll show you mine if you show me yours first
Let's compare scars I'll tell you whose is worse
Let's unwrite these pages and replace them with our own words

We live on front porches and swing life away
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave 'til the end
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand

I've been here so long I think that it's time to move
The winter's so cold summer's over too soon
Let's pack our bags and settle down where palm trees grow
I've got some friends some that I hardly know
But we've had some times I wouldn't trade for the world
We chase these days down with talks of the places that we will go

We live on front porches and swing life away
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave 'til the end
I won't cross these streets until you hold my hand
Until you hold my hand

Ill show you mine if you show me yours first
Lets compare scars I'll tell you whose is worse
Lets unwrite these pages and replace them with our own words

We live on front porches and swing life away
We get by just fine here on minimum wage
If love is a labor I'll slave till the end
I wont cross these streets until you hold my hand

Swing life away
Swing life away
Swing life away
Swing life away

today in social psychology janice touched on stereotypes.
yes, by now everybody regards me as the st pats BOY,

who is naturally smart because its a saint school nobody heard of in the west,
very rich because i live in a condo just because of the school i come from,,
a heavy drinker because rich people know how to enjoy the good things in life,
probably good in computers coz i screwed up my own psp,
a music geek because since everyone can play the over-rated guitar, i'm scratching the violin,

so janice told the course to come up with three stereotypes, and asked me to compile them into a document file to present to the class, here's the list: (sorry for the poor grammar/spelling/english/vocab. cheenapok people, what to do.)

All smokers are bad. (chow, you know what to do.)

People who dye their hair are bad. (just cheenapok.)

All drinkers are bad. (so much for lasalle's friends.)

People with tattoos are bad. (hi ah tao.)

People with piercings are bad. (hooray me.)

All bangalas are rude. (racism here.)

China women are geylang prostitutes. (LEARN FREAKING ENGLISH.)

All bangalas have motives behind their smiles. (horny bastards with clean intentions.)

All Philippines are maids. (my maid can speak better chinese than me.)

Girls who walked with their legs wide open are not virgins. ("THERE SEEMS TO BE SOMETHING STUCK UP MY ******.)

People who wear ring on their ‘ring-finger’ are married. (go yellow lah, got free engraving.)

Male Malay uncles who are crippled on the left are Mas Selamat. (no more late night roti pratas for you aye.)

Girls who dress scantily are sluts. (no shit.)

Guys who wear bright colour super skinny jeans are hooligans. (that's why they're always so angry. with all the blood forced to rush to their head, they lose their temper all the time.)

Girls who have big boobs have no brains. (ARE YOU SURE? I KNOW OF ONE GIRL WHO HAS NEITHER BOOBS, NOR BRAINS. *coughvicoughvicoughancoughacough*)

Short people are egoistic. (bullshit.)

Indians are smelly. ("i happen to have some deo, you want some deo?")

People who loves body art are sadistic and mostly gangsters. (ah tao again, you're the only person i can relate to.)

People who communicate well with opposite sexes are flirtatious. (smooth with the ladies, rough on the edges.)

Tall people tends to be clumsy and fall over easily. (AHAHAHA TELL ME ABOUT IT.)

Tall people tends to look down on others. (no, really? IF THEY'RE SO TALL, WHERE'S THE ONLY DIRECTION THEY CAN LOOK IF THEY WANNA TALK TO THEIR FRIENDS? no duh.)

Lowly educated people are rough and rude. (social ethnics in place for chinese lessons, anyone?)

Guys with black nail polish are ‘emo’. (wtf, someone's obviously shooting me.)

People who do not listen to parents are rebellious. (go juowi, go.)

Skinny people are anorexic and bulimic. (is it such a crime to love food if you're skinny? they're all targetting me.)

All guys with earrings are gays. (seriously, somebody really hates me in the course. OOPS I FORGOT, EVERYBODY DISLIKES ME.)

All man can’t be trusted. (such an ah lian statement.)

Guys who go Brazilian waxing are gays. (i love my leg hair please.)

NUM=gays. (sorry eugene!)

People in Poly have a lot of free time. (provided they see the polyclinic doctor everyday.)

ITE people are hopeless. (I.T.E.- Its The End.)

JC people are smart. (friends who stayed back twice and THEN transfer to poly? wise move.)

All products from china are toxic/of low quality. (that includes your psp, ipod, and possibly almost everything except milk.)

All skinny people have an eating disorder. (I.LOVE.FOOD.)

Spoken/written English in western countries is perfect. (its just the same as "china people are good in chinese." )

Autistic people are stupid. (no idea what autistic means.)

Working at a young age = school dropouts. (GIVE US OUR DAMMED MONEY.)

Guys are good at sports. (look at me.)

Girls take forever to do anything. (that includes going to the toilet, putting on make-up, and even trying to turn them on.)

Girls are associated by the colour pink. (ah lian w0rHxZs!!!!!11111ONEONEONEone.)

Girls who like pink are bimbos. (HIM-bos.)

Men cannot do housework. (let's hear them say that when their kitchen sink's leaking or the light bulb blows.)

People who have tattoo are ex-convicts. (i have this friend who was a nerd, he had a police report for littering at pasir ris bus interchange. does that count?)

Girls are always moody. (period.)

Goods that are branded are naturally longer lasting. (CRUMPLER! WOOHOO!)

Girls are poor soccer players. (they have to train to be better with balls. sooner or later.)

Girls with big butts can give birth to more children. (not true. as they give birth to more children, their hips increase. so the bigger their asses are, the more prone for women to closing their baby making factories.)

Those who go clubbing are not serious in relationships. (the crappy techno music, the stinking tobacco smoke, and slutty dance girls grinding.)

People who drives cars are rich. (hotwheels, mattel. I'M ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY RICH.)

Mothers are supposed to stay at home and look after their children. (or alternatively, they could always bring their children to work, and expose them to harmful office politics.)

All Indians are smelly. (WHAT, AGAIN?)

Youths who hang out late at night are gangsters and youths at risk. ("but i was just taking my dog out for a walk! honest!")

Girls who marry before 21 are women who have kids before they are married. (by getting married, women cover their prematial sex in a situation of pregnancy.)

People who goes clubbing are people who plays around. (repeated stereotypical question, next please.)

Kids who have broken families are likely to be problematic when they’re teens. (disagree. single parent families to me have more freedom and are happier people as they grow up. because the single parent receives less expectations and stress because of the absence of the other parent, they're less likely to be influenced externally on how to raise their children.)

Malays have more chances of having shotgun marriages. (so fake xiolxszxsz.)

Whites are bias against people different from them. (white is just a tone.)

All Africans are poor people. (JENKEM anybody?)

People with tattoos and piercing are not good people. (here we go again.)

Teenagers who shout and scream in public are kids who haven’t grow up. (they're just the happy, outgoing, and energetic bunch! you see in ngee ann poly, hms, bzse course!)

Failing in O levels means you’re screwed. (others who disagree think that just like your psle, a levels, tests, exams, is all just an illusion.)

People land up in ITE because they are stupid. (NEXT.)

As long as you didn’t do well in your academics, you cant do well in life. (so asian.)

Gangsters can’t do well in life, earn big bucks, have good marriages and awesome family. (gangsters have their own families to begin with, why would they want to start another one?)

People who marry before 18 are more likely to get divorced and get married again. (how is it even possible in singapore?)

People who go through relationships in secondary schools are more likely to break up. (we all break up/down/left/right/centre at points of our lives.)

Indian guys are “bad” guys. (prasana must be dammed pissed off at class today.)

Blonds are stupid. (applies for yellow/orange/brownish-tinted hair.)

fin.

we are being heard.

2008-10-30T23:22:00.002+08:00

today red told us he knew all our blog addresses, and that fong reads ALL our blogs.
which is what motivated to continue blogging.
so i can be heard.

its like i'm starting a new life altogether again.

reformatted my comp,
new semester,
lost all my mp3 songs,
upgraded my psp to official firmware 5.01, (in other words, that means i can't play games for the next two years until a genius figures out how to hack my psp altogether again.)

together with new teachers,
ms prisca- poa teacher, very aizai and slack=i like.
ms janice- tarci's class advisor teaching my social psychology, she has an impression that all matthews and marcuses are nice people.
ms emily- stats teacher, an easterner with ij heritage. knows clearly about the sji/st pats conflict.

turned down.

2008-10-18T00:10:00.002+08:00

you wanna know why i turned down the post in tp?

it was because of you,
you fucked up dammit.

slowly deleting you away from my life.

friendless.

2008-10-11T03:13:00.000+08:00

i have no friends.

monsters

2008-08-29T01:35:00.006+08:00

Monsters by Matchbook Romance

girl, what's come between you and me?
look right through me
i'll let it go
i can't help this feeling anymore
i won't go anywhere
maybe you'll see me

we are
we are the shaken
we are the monsters
underneath your bed
yeah
believe what you read
we are
we are mistaken
we are the voices
inside your head
yeah
believe what you see

it came as no surprise
you bring me back to life
believe me
you bleed for me
i'll bleed for you
i caught you walking through walls
drowned with applause
from the world that makes me crazy

we are
we are the shaken
we are the monsters
underneath your bed
yeah
believe what you read
we are
we are mistaken
we are the voices
inside your head
yeah
believe what you see

we are the monsters
we are the monsters
we are the monsters
underneath your bed
we are the voices
we are the voices
we are the voices
underneath your bed
we are the monsters
we are the monsters
we are the monsters
yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah

we are
we are the shaken
we are the monsters
underneath your bed
yeah
believe what you read
we are
we are mistaken
we are the voices
inside your head
yeah
believe what you see

we are
we are the shaken
we are the monsters
underneath your bed
yeah
believe what you see

i was on youtube just now, watching how youtubers nailed the guitar solo for this song just a moment ago.

when one of its related videos linked to SEA MONSTERS from nat geo.

one of the comments read:
"when i was a kid and i used to go to church.m i was into dinosaurs and it said nothing about them in the bible, but we have everdince they lived ect.

so i asked my vicar why arnt dinosaurs in the bible, and he said "they just arnt"

god damn that ruined my child hood."

apart from making the youtube comments their blogposts,
another this that i found out of place was how small the things were that were able to spoil that dude's day during his childhood.

still i could remember how much i emo-ed over a week during a grocery trip to cold storage because my dad wouldn't get me one of those curly-whirly, colourful dinosaur lollipops at the cashier counter.

shut the fuck up, they're not even real.
they don't even fucking smile like that.

that would really hurt me bad.
but then, there's my mum.
who would always have heated arguements with my dad on the things to get and what not to.

to us its not like it costs much, but to him its a whole lot just make him happy over monsters.

i guess my dad was just afraid of spoiling me when i grew up (which he did) and me becoming insensible on the many things in life, like dinosaurs didn't really smile like that, or smiled at all.

maybe he did mean something more about just the dinosaurs.
and maybe they were like my friends,
shut the fuck up, they're not even real.
they don't even fucking smile like that.

but it naturally comes to meaning a lot to me. so i suppose i'm the fool in taking THAT cost.

its okay, its not that it costs much,

just let me be happy over things that don't exist.

like some fool.

oh and you know the blankets? they turned out to be quilt covers, as thin as silk.

how you guys love me freezing with my "cold-but-not-so-cold" aircon in in transgressive artic conditions.

ex-classmates.

2008-08-28T02:32:00.003+08:00

met tarci, alexstine, and dominic for coffee.

drop your club's membership and follow us- lasalle's friends..

things i've learnt on how to treat your ex-classmate:

i offered you my hand,
but you spat all over my fucking face,
and stepped all over me.

i tried to be your friend,
but you ran me down and put me to waste,
you told the others, backstabbing me like its free.

YOU FUCKING JOSEPHIAN.

Vagina Blanket.

2008-08-26T21:16:00.006+08:00

*blog post as requested by trissy nocturnal. :)

Violent Pornography- System Of A Down

Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody fucks.
Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody sucks.

Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody cries
Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody dies.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you it's Nabisco,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you it's Nabisco,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you didn't know,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you didn't know,
Bet you didn't know,
Bet you didn't know.

Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody fucks.
Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody sucks.

Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody dies,
Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody cries.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you it's Nabisco,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you it's Nabisco,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you didn't know,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you didn't know,
Bet you didn't know,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a violent pornogrpahy!
Choking chicks and SODOMY!
The kinda shit you get on your TV!

It's a violent pornogrpahy!
Choking chicks and SODOMY!
The kinda shit you get on your TV!

Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody sucks.
Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody fucks.

Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody dies.
Everybody, everybody, everybody livin' now.
Everybody, everybody, everybody cries.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you it's Nabisco,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you it's Nabisco,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you didn't know,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a non-stop disco
Bet you didn't know,
Bet you didn't know,
Bet you didn't know.

It's a violent pornogrpahy!
Choking chicks and SODOMY!
The kinda shit you get on your TV!

It's a violent pornogrpahy!
Choking chicks and SODOMY!
The kinda shit thats on your TV!

It's a violent pornogrpahy!
Choking chicks and SODOMY!
The kinda shit thats on your TV!

It's on the TV.
It's on your TV.
FUCK!...
Turn off the TV.

Can you say brainwashing?

b-b-b-b-brainwashing

It's a non-stop disco.

been forever since i blogged. (as usual)

during the time lapse between the last post and this, i...

let some josephian stay over in my house,

got drunk,

quit being a catechist,

got drunk,

became more pervertic,

got drunk,

celebrated dominic's birthday,

got drunk,
went through bloody polytechnic exams,

got drunk,

lost my camwhoric spirit,

got drunk,
fired my indonesian maid,
gotten a new one,

did i mention getting drunk?
applied as a primary school relief teacher,

taught primary school kiddos in st ants maths,

managed to convince juowi into scamming janell to buying a "because i am a maid" tee,

been to this ncss carnival celebrating 50 years of social work, (enslaved as a volunteer)

and a little insight on what happened today?
i'm on holiday you fucknuts. nothing but staying at home farming fungus from your toenails.

well, not exactly.
my dad just took me to ikea. (sorry sis, didn't get you anything.)
and told me that i needed a new blanket.

only after 17 years of my life.
he finally let me out on this secret.

"you know that blanket you've been using all your life? its really been there since you were in the HOSPITAL."

no shit dad.
yes people.
for those that came to my house,
room,
and did what ever you did with my blanket,
humping,
licking,
grinding,

its been used to clean my mum's bloody vagina 17 years ago.

hohoho.

amen.

happifuckingrthday

2008-08-03T00:33:00.006+08:00

Let It Be- Carol Woods and Timonthy T. Mitchum

When I find myself in times of trouble,
Mother Mary comes to me,
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me,
Speaking words of wisdom, let it be.

Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

And when the broken hearted people living in the world agree,
There will be an answer, let it be.
For though they may be parted
There is still a chance that they will see,
There will be an answer. let it be.

Let it be, let it be

And when the night is cloudy,
There is still a light,
That shines on me,
Shine until tomorrow, let it be.
I wake up to the sound of music,
Mother Mary comes to me,
speaking words of wisdom, let it be.

Let it be, let it be

its official.

i'm turning uglier by the year.
just look at me last year:

so adorable, so handsome, so charming,

so hot,

so curiously innocent,

so dreamy,

so outrageously cute,

so blankly obedient.

and now look at me the past few weeks:

so ugly, so detestable, so uncouth,

so horny, so pervertic,

so unsatisfied,

so greedy.

so lazy, so unkempt,

so vain, so fat,

so lustful.

but who gives a fuck. i'm not me anymore.
birthday just passed a few days ago, bitches refuse to hand over the pictures. don't come asking me, "BUT I THOUGHT THEY WERE SOME GUYS ALSO BESIDES THE GIRLS WHO TOOK PHOTOS WHAT?"

don't expect me to call the guys bastards.
they're all just BITCHES. period.

got two new guitars during my birthday, as you can see.
one tgm, and one controller for my wii.
(imma ROCKING GUITAR HERO STAR, BITAAAAAACH.)

last day of interdisciplinary studies filled me with mixed feelings.
happy because *************** is over,
sad coz life management skills by ms samantha lau would always be missed. :(

the class and EYE.

"so which are the psycho students?"
"the one that aren't BZSE students."

birthday's been sweet, salty, sour, and bitter. (happy birthday bryan, aaron, harry potter, j.k. rowling, gerald, eudist, and all the 31st julyians out there, you rock.) you name it, i been through all kinds of birthdays practically cramp-packed into this very special day. too many details and too little photos, leaves me to just cutting off this post suddenly again.

WATCHA GONNA DO? SUE ME?

and i'm not fucking leaving this last line of this post for ANY of you.
(those people that make me emo.)

business ain't for evil.

2008-07-29T23:06:00.002+08:00

i've been playing my guitar more than my violin recently, must be some calling. maybe i wasn't met for all this violin crap, maybe i really DO suck in music. oh wells, time to prove assholes wrong.

went to school early today to chiong our project, i didn't really chiong typed about 100+ words for our researching essay.

redante talked to me about why i hated business.

"matthew, there seems to be a mind block between you and business-related modules. why do you have the negative mentality that you're last in the course?"

"because its true, you showed my grades to everybody. i'm dead fucking last. besides, i think business is just a piece of crap. money for making more money to spend on yourself. its evil."

"its a neccessary thing, money. not a neccessary evil. that's why we're teaching you people how to use it for good!"

well i'm sorry.
its not like a 9 year old kid like me would understand.

got pranked today by some fuckers. nuff said.

hms day

2008-07-27T21:21:00.004+08:00

me still enjoying my shitty poly life as usual.
so busy i haven't posted in MONTHS.
the sleep-deprivation is really getting to me, keeping awake during class is like breaking a guinness world record each passing day.
Presenting:
Sleep-deprivation.

and i didn't even notice cynthia snapping me and editting the picture.
she did all this, with my eyes OPENED.

hms day came and went,
they had some treasure hunt thing, we were supposed to spot out things that didn't belong/illogical stuffs.

someone using a mouse on nothing. LOL NICE TRY DAMMIT.

a wet floor sign in the middle of nowhere.

and there were like two girls playing chinese chess with an english chess board? or something? hell had no idea.

been hanging out with the two JWs recently. (jiawen and juowi.)
Presenting:
Meat-deprivation.

a failed attempt to compare our heights, girl ran away in shame.

her minature jacket which hugged my skin ever so tightly like a leatherskin mask on a botox face.
Presenting:
Stupidity-deprivation.

gay. yes, i know.

bzse forum.

2008-07-08T23:51:00.002+08:00

the bzse forum meet the parents/forum rocked.
maybe only because the skit was hella cool.

well enough of that,
coz i didn't have photos of myself. FUCK.

life's still being a bitch to me.
just can't stand people getting high over the "I LOVE GOD" hype. its becoming so over-rated nobody cares anymore. they don't, BUT I DO. ITS FUCKING ANNOYING.

projects and ccas have been taking a toll over me. especially the post-forum fatique and the upcoming strings concert i've been trying so hard to perform in. just too emo to blog again.

fuck you world.

psp-less.

2008-06-23T01:50:00.003+08:00

I'm Yours- Jason Mraz

Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it
I tried to be chill but your so hot that i melted
I fell right through the cracks, and i'm tryin to get back
before the cool done run out i'll be givin it my best test
and nothin's gonna stop me but divine intervention
I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some

I won't hesitate no more,
no more, it cannot wait i'm yours

Well open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love
listen to the music at the moment maybe sing with me
Ah, la peaceful melody
It's your god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved Loved

So, i won't hesitate no more,
no more, it cannot wait i'm sure
there's no need to complicate our time is short
this is our fate, i'm yours

*scat*

I've been spendin' way too long checkin' my tongue in the mirror
and bendin' over backwards just to try to see it clearer
my breath fogged up the glass
and so I drew a new face and laughed
I guess what I'm a sayin'is there ain't no better reason
to rid yourself of vanity and just go with the seasons
it's what we aim to do
our name is our virtue

I won't hesitate no more, no more
it cannot wait, i'm sure
(there's no need to complicate
our time is short
it cannot wait, i'm yours 2x

no please don't complicate, our time is short
this is our fate, im yours.
no please don't hesitate no more, no more
it cannot wait, the sky is yours!)

well open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love love
listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
ah, la one big family
it's your god forsaken right to be loved, loved, loved, loved
open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love love
listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
ah, la happy family
it's our god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved
listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
ah, la peaceful melodies
it's you god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved...

been stuck on this song far too long, thanks to channel newsasia and its album critics on jason mraz's "we sing, we dance, we steal things" from what i've been watching from majodi centre in malaysia. (yes they have channel newsasia in j.b. how epic.

been learning this song on my ukulele, valerie says we might even start a ukulele ensemble! LOL. (considering the condition my violin is in now.)

lended my psp to YAting.
(or at least that's what they call her now.)
i'm psp-less for the next few days it seems.
self-control matt, self-control.

the crushing blue rain contributed to my failure in going to church for morning mass.
which made me forgot to collect my teaching materials for catechism next week. T_T

went for dinner outside,
when my cousin went,
"wa matt, you okay anot? first time see you eat so fast."

you probaly haven't seen me eat my fastest. yet.

dad finally realised my 2nd ear lobe piercing.
"HIYO HOW COME SUDDENLY GOT ANOTHER ONE."

"orh, because i sad then pierce lor."

"YOU WANT HOW MANY SIA. LATER YOUR WHOLE FACE FULL OF METAL."

i have a metal plate in my head.

iGod

2008-06-21T22:22:00.007+08:00

Old Books, Old Mirrors- Jedadiah Bernards

i apologise again, this is gonna be another emo post.
sorry for the recent bad karma. but i can't help living a sad life.

the church camp at majodi for the confirmation twos rocked.
never from a class has my appreciation felt so appreciated. :D

left to right: gregory the busy cca man, nat from WEIRONG, justina the chewing gum girl, abigail from SHITING, joel and the NONONONONOS, clara the cassandra look-a-like, amelia the BIRTHDAY GIRL, cassandra the clara look-a-like, nicole the beautiful hand artist.

thanks guys, made my holiday.
or maybe my whole month.
or maybe this whole year.

camp chief-ed by ian and eugene :)

did the camp games. nobody complained about the games. not yet.

ah fuck it, i can't blog about camp now in this mood. just gonna do it some other time. the holiday's been a bitch. you know those people who get caught up in everything and get so busy. and ultimately in the end, they realise they did nothing?- introducing matthew han.

and for those looking for the photo album, its here http://picasaweb.google.com/drakcorian1/Con2Camp08IGod02

what i've learnt.

2008-06-09T22:32:00.005+08:00

Check Yes Juliet- We The Kings

Check yes Juliet
are you with me
rain is falling down on the sidewalk
I won't go until you come outside
check yes Juliet
kill the limbo
I'll keep tossing rocks at your window
there's no turning back for us tonight

lace up your shoes
A O A O ah
here's how we do

run baby run
don't ever look back
they'll tear us apart
if you give them the chance
don't sell your heart
don't say we're not meant to be
run baby run
forever will be
you and me

check yes Juliet
I'll be waiting
wishing, wanting
yours for the taking
just sneak out
and don't tell a soul goodbye
check yes Juliet
here's the countdown
3...2...1... now fall in my arms
now they can change the locks
don't let them change your mind

lace up your shoes
A O A O ah
here's how we do

run baby run
don't ever look back
they'll tear us apart
if you give them the chance
don't sell your heart
don't say we're not meant to be
run baby run
forever will be
you and me

we're flying through the night
we're flying through the night
way up high,
the view from here is getting better with
you by my side

run baby run
don't ever look back
they'll tear us apart
if you give them the chance
don't sell your heart
don't say we're not meant to be
run baby run
forever will be...

run baby run
don't ever look back
they'll tear us apart
if you give them the chance
don't sell your heart
don't say we're not meant to be
run baby run
forever will be
you and me
You and me
You and me

society is a state of dammation.

why?
because poly has taught me so much about life.
because nothing in me changed but my age.
because i've lived by "doing what i enjoyed/loved/liked."
because i never thought that "sometimes in life, we have to do the shitty things we disliked."

i've learnt that you cannot make someone love you.
(all you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.)

i've learnt that no matter how much you care, some people just don't.
(juowi you are who i have to thank.)

i've learnt that it takes years of friendship to earn and build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof. to destroy it.
(thanks to secondary school friends.)

i've learnt that you shouldn't compare yourself to others- they're more screwed up than you think.
(thanks to fucked up course people i hate.)

i've learnt that alcohol and cigarettes can get you by for a night, and after that, you just need to deal with life all over again.
(dom you still owe me you faggot.)

i've learnt that you can keep puking even after long you think you've finished.
(my liver burns so much now its become dust.)

i've learnt that freedom of choice/speech comes with responsibility, unless you're a screwed up lecturer.
(bzse people, you just know the people you love to hate. :D)

i've learnt that regardless of how hot and happening a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and lots of money takes place after.

i've learnt that the people you care most about in life are just taken away from you too fucking soon and all the less important ones just never go away.
(because god wants us to care for them too and bring us all closer together, yada yada, etc...)

i've learnt that talk has become so cheap its turned free. things that remain expensive are your school fees, (for repeating a semester.)cab fares, (for late mornings you wake for school.)textbooks, (when you just wanna quit school and study on your own.)

i've learnt that everyone should believe in something- i believe its time for me to give up.

i've learnt that when in doubt, mumble. when in trouble, delegate.
(you big-mouthed motherfucker that talks so much on other groups when you just fucking slack during our projects.)

i've learnt that when you finally get something you wanted to bad, it doesn't even fucking matter or is such of a big deal anymore.
(most appreciated to royston.)

i've learnt never to argue with a fool; people might not know the difference.
(to all the fools i've ever exchanged heated words with.)

i've learnt that everything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
(i love donuts. is eating them during class such a sin?)

i've learnt that beauty is only skin deep, ugly goes to the bone.
(cheer up jasmine!)

i've learnt that the only difference between a dog and a violinist is that a only a dog knows when to stop scratching.
(all the "nice" comments i've been receiving from everyone who heard me play.)

i've learnt that if someone smiles when something goes wrong, they have someone else in mind to blame.
(to slackers i've heard so much from other people.)

i've learnt that sometimes when you think you're the only fucker who hates the world, they're not so open fuckers who are in the same shit as you.
(ronny and apple, thanks for making me feel better.)

i've learnt that when you're having problems with yourself, you're either over-reactive, or nobody gives a fuck about you.
(cheers for being aizai, chris woo and arling.)

i've learnt that if your seniors didn't tell you that you were the best, it probably wasn't you. :)
(your most difficult junior still looks up to you, sharr.:D)

i've learnt that most of us aren't exactly sure of what we want, but we're pretty sure we don't have it.
(ms nocty, still planning on that shop aye?)

i've learnt that when you help someone, never expect help. for it could come back to you, painfully.
(a dragonboater in my school.)

i've learnt envy. "they're so many fucking less-forunate children in the world than you so you'd better fucking don't take your blessings for granted!"
(i'm in the school of HUMANITIES.)

life's bitch has been making its rounds on me recently.(like who didn't feel it?) so i'm not gonna post much details on me.

camps are coming soon.

might,
MIGHT,
MIGHT
post some photos and other stuffs after the camps.

will have to get my maid to check on my mood first again.

toodles.

Cb is for Carbonara

2008-05-29T23:57:00.000+08:00

shut the fuck up because your mouth can't stop moving
its the presentation slides here that i am doing.
why do you have to be so fucking immature?
screwing up my plan, just to make yourself sure.
if only you've been more participative towards our common goal
you wouldn't be so messed up, both foolish and bold.

your godammed mindless comments on other's work
the lack of quality in your own, they lurk.
critising jokes on how dumb they're sounding or how they look,
they're observing you too, idiot. reading you like a book.

shut the fuck up because i think you're dumbfuckingly tactless
you have no fucking idiot how many people on your blood, they've cursed.
and then for the person who thinks our course is fun and such,
some people don't share your dense mindset, not as fucking much.
and not everybody thinks you're making school a better experience for us
you're just having a great time, because the lecturers are just fucking bias.

bzse fuckers, as dense as a rock.
y'all need fucking open your eyes.

bzse fuckers, as dumb as a doornail.
y'all need to die in your sleep.

bzse fuckers, you all fucking suck.
y'all need to be screwed in the asshole.

bzse fuckers, too all epicly dull.
y'all need to be striked by lightning.

bzse fuckers, so fucking childish.
y'all need to be knocked by a bus.

bzse fuckers, talk too bluntly.
y'all need to get choked on chewing gum.

bzse fuckers, y'all just bitches diguised as pups.
so you can just FUCKING shut up.

the last post.

2008-05-19T23:47:00.004+08:00

Hero- Superchick

No one sits with him, he doesn't fit in
But we feel like we do when we make fun of him
'Cause you want to belong,do you go along?
'Cause his pain is the price paid for you to belong.
It's not like you hate him or want him to die,
But maybe he goes home and thinks suicide
Or he comes back to school with a gun at his side
Any kindness from you might have saved his life.

Heroes are made when you make a choice

You could be a hero - heroes do what's right
You could be a hero - you might save a life
You could be a hero - you could join the fight
For what's right, for what's right, for what's right

No one talks to her, she feels so alone.
She's in too much pain to survive on her own.
The hurt she can't handle overflows to a knife
She writes on her arm wants to give up her life.
Each day she goes on is a day that she's brave
Fighting the lie that giving up is the way
Each moment of courage her own life she saves
When she throws the pills out, a hero is made.

Heroes are made when you make a choice

You could be a hero - heroes do what's right
You could be a hero - you might save a life
You could be a hero - you could join the fight
For what's right, for what's right, for what's right

No one talks to him about how he lives
He thinks that the choices he makes are just his
Doesn't know he's a leader with the way he behaves
And others will follow the choices he's made.
He lives on the edge, he's old enough to decide.
His brother who wants to be him is just nine.
He can do what he wants because it's his right,
[ Find more Lyrics at www.mp3lyrics.org/MDdp ]
The choices he makes change a nine-year-old's life.

Heroes are made when you make a choice

You could be a hero - heroes do what's right
You could be a hero - you might save a life
You could be a hero - you could join the fight
For what's right, for what's right, for what's right

(rap)
Little Mikey D. was the one in class
who every day got brutally harassed.
This went on for years until he decided
That ever again would he shed another tear
So he walked through the door,
Grabbed a four four out of his father's dresser drawer,
And said I can't take life no more.
And like that, life can be lost
But this ain't even about that
All of us just sat back
And watched it happen
Thinking it's not our responsibility
To solve a problem that isn't about me
This IS our problem
This is just one of the daily scenarios
In which we chose to close our eyes,
Instead of doing the right thing.
If we make a choice
Be the voice
For those who won't speak up for themselves,
How many lives would be saved
Changed, rearranged?
Now it's our time
To pick a side.
Now don't keep walking by,
Not wanting to intervene,
'Cause you just want to exist;
And never be seen
So let's wake up
Change the world-
Our time is now!

You could be a hero - (our time is
now) heroes do what's right
You could be a hero - (our time is
now) you might save a life
You could be a hero - (our time is
now) you could join the fight
For what's right, for what's right.

this is probably gonna be my last post on this blog as i've been too busy for anything except school work.

gonna post pictures in no particular order so don't complain if everything's random.

many people have been asking why my blog's been so lifeless,
well you know what folks? READ THE FIRST TWO LINES.

so what's been going on recently?
lemme think...
OH, MARCUS'S CONFIRMATION.
happy confirmation marcus!
(i know this is like damn late, but yeah. LOL.)

"HEY LOOK, ITS MARKERSSSSSS."

school's been a bitch, but i'm having my e-learning week now. so i'm taking this opporunitity to blog. been zao-ing school anyway, BUT not that often.

the red dot of DEATH.

been spending my ponned days of school in other schools, doing my work. like the other time i went to dominic's class. DAMN YOU, PRETEND YOU DON'T KNOW ME.

and his class rep was like, "EH CAREFUL WITH THAT HAIR AH. LIKE POKE MY FACE HOW."

don't go telling everyone,
"EH MATTHEW ZAO SCHOOL LEH."
because you wouldn't last TWO seconds in my course. i mean,

try reading the first sentence, its already three lines long.

and even if you end up going to school, you'll end up like this,

or even what me and juowi came out with, the whole eclipse family of smileys,

that's happy, and angry, and sad, and angry, and etc...

maybe even m&m pyramids.

oh yes, juowi.
introducing, my sji friend,

he's SHY. lol. probably my closest friend i have amongst the faggots and she-faggots,

blocking out people except us in toilet shots,

and other more retarded stuffs.

went to simei care centre as one of the service thingies,

it was like the only good thing i remembered from the whole experience.

been meeting paolo and tarci a lot after school, talking about how you have to handle people, even if you hate them so.

they're like becoming life advisors now.

another drunk, random shot.

that's pao with dominic, and martin. met up also for iron man. i think.

another random shot. OKAY SKIP.

its been the first few weeks of school and here we're already have scandals,

snapped by juowi. please don't kill me.

some picture i was instructed to instruct people draw during life management skills on LISTENING SKILLS. the actual picture i was supposed to make my group members draw is in the middle.

and the reason why people don't like me, or just hate to work with me for group projects,

i keep crapping around too much,

playing with other people's slippers,

and posing for the camera.

we've been invading the expensive canteen at sim too,

me after ordering carbonara.
"OMG ITS CB. AHAHHAHAHAHA."

floating forks. fascinating. its no wonder university people need help.
WHAT AM I SAYING. the one who needs help is ME.

oops, another out of the blue shot, me being stupid. NEXT.

probably the only good thing that has been happening in school are my ccas.

strings, with shaun behind. and yes, i'm the only guy, besides shaun, our senior. =.=

"WE CAN PLAY THE VAIO-LEEN WORHSXZSX."

another another random t3 shot in the toilet.
"OMG THAT'S A FLY IN THE URINAL. AIM DAMMIT."

sorry for this crappy post,
school sucks, and i can't help it.
like how can blogging and moodswings mix?
but i just had to post this long overdue pictures.

going home everyday takes me more than 2 hours.
and even after the long train ride, messages are trying to hit me,

its god's calling i tell you.

oh wells,

i just hope things will get better, with the upcoming camps coming up. :D

and thank you everyone who helped me in any way during this fucked up period of my life.

bye.

poly commences.

2008-04-16T23:07:00.007+08:00

Squirrel Songs (Squirrely Wrath, Lord And Master, So I'm A Squirrel)- Foamy The Squirrel

Squirrely Wrath
I will kill you all
Nothing you can do about it
I will kill you all
Nothing you can do about it

Squirrely Wrath
Squirrely Wrath
Squirrely Wrath

You're all gonna die
You're all gonna die

Squirrely Wrath
Squirrely Wrath

Lord And Master
I'm the lord and master
You all are bastards
Worship me
Or i'll stab your eyes till you bleed
I'm the lord and master.

So I'm A Squirrel
So i'm a squirrel
You're not
How pathetic you are

So i'm a squirrel
You're not
Just a human
How pathetic you are

You don't have a fluffy tail
You don't have squirrely wrath
You're just built to destroy
While i collect some nuts
You all SUCK.

that song's from squirrel songs ONE, by foamy the squirrel,
here's a pic of him:

"for those of you who do not know me, do a DAMN GOOGLE SEARCH."
yeah, you should actually.

poly commences.
met many new friends on my first day of school, which is the obvious-est of the obvious.

business and social enterprise.
so what is it all about?
Wikipedia on Social Enterprise.
educate yourself, street ingrates.

just joking. LOL.

well basically its on learning how business and enterprises can actually benefit the community, especially on helping poverty.

mrs joyce tang, our course manager, told us that we're the only 45 people in the WORLD currently studying for this diploma. probably just to make us feel special. BUT I ALREADY KNOW I AM. :DDDDDDD

so many of my batch peeps are like asking,
"so how's it like in ngee ann poly?"
"what's the guy:girl ratio?"
"are the guys/girls hot/cute?"

well, dominic told me,
"aiya your school you throw one stone hit five girls one lah."

NOT TRUE. business and social enterprise is EVENLY guys and girls.

and alexstine said,
"you drop your books, confirm got a lot of girls help you pick up one."

TRUE. but, they only want to help you pick up your books coz YOU'RE BLOCKING THE DAMN WAY FOR THEM TO WALK.

anyway school was fun, but stressful,
still trying to fit into the long journeys

did some tips on poly life, gonna be posting them up soon.
i hope.
and wei rong's been coming to my house recently. i don't know why. he claims its fun being at my place. for some weird reason. pwned him a pocket uno, TWICE.

"scolded" my class yesterday. i think. i didn't even know i was so mad they kept so quiet. it was just too freaky and tense of an environment to teach catechism in.

lectures are fun.
we do all sorts of stuffs,
like have a class mass convo,
or start a dota match,
or even bitch about the lecturers, (which i pity in the end of the day anyway.)

making fun of my pinnoy teacher with his accent.
(SORRY RICARDO. LOL.)

and that's justine saying he's gonna treat us lunch:

PORK CHOPS AH.

did some I.T. applications assignment.
we're suppose to do a quiz based on what we learnt on the first lesson.
this is what i did,
my quiz, for vista users.
use this one if the first one doesn't work.

its WORTH LOOKING AT.
so yeah, please do tell me what you think. :D

AND IT WAS GABRIEL'S BIRTHDAY ON FRIDAY. XDDDDDDD
camwhored at roxy squaure, being the commercial and advertisement critics we all are around the shops there.

high spelt as hight. or something. tcm people. (eg: my mum.)

the poster my godma claimed to be so pornographic.

more tcm places,

the lift, with me and my godbro trying to meet in the middle of each side of the escalator.

the dustbin in front of the escalator, was trying to pose peeing there. the security guard scolded us after that.
"EH BOY YOU FROM WHAT SCHOOL AH."

"ST PATS. ST PATS."

some shop that stated welcome and open instead of CLOSED.

messing around with the buttons that ACTUALLY work.

martin tan trying to pull me out of the darkness.

the cube and i.

end.

2008-04-15T02:22:00.003+08:00

something i blogged on my introduction blog in my school's web portal minus the photos (I'M BUSY NOWADAYS LAH, SORRY. T_T):

HYO. (that's short for hey yo.)

YAY A BLOGGING ASSIGNMENT. I SO TOTALLY DIDN'T EXPECT THIS. :D

*takes a deep breath*

hope i don't bore you with this long post.

i'm o level cert holder, matthew han. (matt/matty)

they call me matty from st patty. i infested planet earth on the 31st of july, 1991 and i share that same birthday with harry potter.

16 turning 17 this year, i hail from st patrick's school, a lasallian instituion some of you may know it from the slacker school opposite chij kc.

i came from three secondary schools before that, jumping schools has a changed streams from normal technical to express by the time i came to st pats in secondary two. :)

since then, adapting to changes was part and parcel of life.

president of photography club, and vice president of my very own peer support board. i LOVE taking photos,

especially during camps. (so bear with my photos. xD) it is during times like these in school where i would allow both my passions to drive me to advocate my services to my ex-school so strongly. as vice president of the peer support board, i heavily instill servant leadership into my juniors. that they are more of GUIDES leaders than LEADING leaders.

a strong believer in the lasallian spirit- to help the last, the lost, and the least, i have participated/facilitated in many lasallian camps around singapore for youth leaders in other lasallian schools like sji, st pats, and even sji international. our mission, is to include rather than to exclude. just like how the founder of lasallian schools, st john baptist de lasalle, also the patron saint of teachers, was.

the statue of the founder, with my friends and i trying to pose their stances.

through it all, i have also learnt that there is such thing as the poor and marginalised in singapore by volunteering my free time along with my friends to help poverty become a thing of the past.

okay enough of lasalle, and more about me!

as you already know, i LOVEEEEE taking photos!

(don't find me weird, its just ME.)

my two dearest things in the world,

coke lime and rubik's cubes. :D

i've been playing the rubik's cube since i was a kid when my mum bought it from some pasar malam. learnt how to solve it only recently, and still learning faster ways of solving it. XD

i have an older sister who is currently studying in australia,

her eyes simply refuse to show on this image, but that's precisely why i uploaded this photo. :D

we skype every sunday to keep telling/reminding/convincing ourselves we're the best handidjaja kids our parents could have.

(p.s. yes, my surname in indonesian is handidjaja. if you were asking. my dad's indonesian.)

(p.s.s. and for people who think she's hot, i'll tell you a secret, its just the make-up. xD)

i used to help out in st anthony's primary school,

especially for those with special needs as they are left behind in school for various purposes like camps where they are not allowed to go just because of their conditions.

i'm not a sports person but,

i do enjoy music. a lot.

i play the piano, guitar, drums, bass, ukelele and the... SOUND RECORDER.

lol. ANYONE INTERESTED IN STARTING A BAND? (i play badly! LOL.)

never been to music lessons, nor have i been graded in anyway.

to me i believe that music is something that should be opened for appreciation to all. not just the rich who can enjoy such privillages.

self-taught, self-learnt, self-expressed.

okay, now for the hard part.

why did i join BZSE?

hm... whenever i go out with my friends during the holidays after we got our posting results, they would ask me,

"EH MATTHEW, WHAT'S YOUR COURSE ON AH. BUSINESS AND SOCIAL ENTERPRISE ON WHAT ONE."

i would just answer,

"aiya, its just another high class name for those nkf people lah. I FUTURE GOLDEN TAP OWNER LEH."

then when the holidays slowly inched to its end, it slowly began to hit me. why did i choose business and social enterprise in the first place? why am i so calm about going to ngee ann poly everyday when it takes me almost two hours to travel from home? (yes i live in pasir ris. bless me.) why didn't i desperately appeal for the psychology courses i want?

those questions kept ringing in my mind, louder and louder, with each passing day.

i love helping people. its sort of a calling. business and social enterprise was my third choice. my first and second, psychology from both ngee ann and temesak respectively. but my grades didn't qualify, and i ended up with you people! for me, i firmly believe that helping to bring joy to others brings about joy in yourself too. and this joy of helping from me was bred only when i exprienced by people not only poor of material needs, but also the rejected and the lonely.

so why do i want to make my best out of these three years in ngee ann poly?

its about the september trip to yunan that a handful lucky of us would go to.

its about witnessing people in need to help us see.

its about being so inspired to do god's work.

its about helping people that seems so real.

its about real poverty. its about its about real people. its about real human lives.

surely something this real cannot be felt through imagination or thoughts, right?

it must be exprienced.

and such expriences are abundant here in this school in forms of opporunities.

okay i think i have gone far enough. a little carried away from what i think. :D

just couldn't sleep and wait for school tomorrow, with the knowledge that i have to wake up early to come to school on time.

OH AND ONE MORE THING, i'm highly nocturnal too. which makes me very very very energetic at night, and hyperactive during the day. just bear with my overzealous attitude for these few days, i'll try to change this bad habit of mine! >.<

and since its 2 in the morning i should really be sleeping else be late for class tomorrow!

(and because some random person on friendster just added me, i have to go check it out.)

(and yes, this shot was taken a few moments ago. just couldn't help. xD)

to 45 of us making poverty history,

CHEERS! :D

stress.

2008-04-10T22:36:00.008+08:00

Blood- My Chemical Romance

Well they encourage your complete cooperation,
Send you roses when they think you need to smile.
I can't control myself because I don't know how,
And they love me for it honestly, I'll be here for a while.

So give them blood, blood, gallons of the stuff!
Give them all that they can drink and it will never be enough.
So give them blood, blood, blood.
Grab a glass because there's going to be a flood!

A celebrated man amongst the gurneys.
They can fix me proper with a bit of luck.
The doctors and the nurses they adore me so,
But it's really quite alarming cause I'm such an awful fuck. (Oh thank you!)

I gave you blood, blood, gallons of the stuff,
I gave you all that you can drink and it has never been enough.
I gave you blood, blood, blood,
I'm the kind of human wreckage that you love!

*edit*
gonna blog this post now since its been collecting dust here for days now.
and i doubt i'll have time to blog once my poly starts. so yeah. heck it.

heard from lots of my friends that although their school life is stressful, they're handling it very efficiently.
for jc people its their project work, i think on modernisation and journey?
and i know its over, but everyone's been telling me about their regrets on choosing wrong subject combinations.

CALM THE FUCK DOWN.

IF EVERYBODY IS COMPLAINING ABOUT EVERY SUBJECT COMBINATION, DOESN'T IT MAKE EVERY JC SUBJECT COMBINATION STRESSFUL ALTOGETHER? BE HAPPY.

for most, MOST secondary schools its their napfa test.
i never liked napfa when i came into st pats.
but OH WELL,
ITS ALL PART OF GROWING UP. XD

for me, our stress levels is something we can train and condition. something like stretching a rubber band. but its only at times where we're not as seasoned and accustomed as we thought we were after a long time of not stretching, we SNAP.

anyways, on to my life. since this is my blog, so its on my things, and wherever my thoughts of interests flow. (noticed the number of "my"s i used.)
orientation sucked. maybe because i thought it did,

FAST FORWARD.

went with tarci to meet martin and gabriel after school.

"SEE THAT? ITS THE OLD SAC."
yeah, we love playing in the national library lift. the feeling of just dropping from 30+ floors, you could almost feel the inertia.

after that i went to meet

KYNA.
(yes you look like some siao charbor. we all know that now. pay me well and i'll take this photo off. LOL.)

talked about all the things we could about our lives, it almost made me feel as though i've come to meet a long lost childhood friend or something. weird feelings i have.

(you can differenciate which photos are took with my phone and which are snapped by hers by the QUALITY. :D)

some random straw thing she rolled, from a failed straw star thingy.
"EH MATT, THIS LOOKS LIKE A "Z" RIGHT.

hijacking my psp, playing burnout dominator.
note: notice the way she presses the buttons. (i had to teach her how to play from upside down.)
but if you actually notice the yellow car,
you might just come with the conclusion its just a crazy woman playing crazy taxi.

that's me with her highlighter. yes, its the trademark highlighter on how dhineesh of st pats would always tell us on how chinese and indian people can always co-exist harmoniously. the black as the cap, and the yellow as the highlighter. CHEERS.
(no seriously, i found that concept very interesting, even after i graduate.)

the best photograph of me ever snapped for the longest time. pity it was taken with her phone, AYE? (JK LAH KYNA.)

and we tried to do a knock-knock joke on spontaneous combustion. a sketch where she participated very inactively, due to her laughing fits.
DISCLAIMER: PLEASE DO NOT WATCH THIS VIDEO.
END OF DISCLAIMER.

yes, everything ended up being burnt in the end, if you didn't get it.

that's us with the straw thingy she failed to fold. after it all, especially the sloppy orientation at my new school, she's definately worth meeting up with. (even though you were late for choosing to BATHE AFTER YOUR CCA before meeting me. =.=)
"BUT I STINKY HOW."

p.s.
keeping the "tag" in good condition.

went to irwin's birthday chalet afterwards.
it was at some other end of pasir ris park. ulu? nah, i've been there before. those people meeting up at his place were like, "EH WHERE WE GOING AH? PRISON IS IT?"

met up with lots of old friends, those in the jc to emphasize on. i could see how stressed up yilong is in mjc. i mean, being in cheer leading and studying his physics/chemistry notes?

"A gas that obeys the ideal gas equation exactly is called an ideal gas."
NO SHIT YO. COULDN'T TELL AYE.

he kept sleeptalking all his formulas and went practicing all his dance moves for his cheer leading routine, blasting his rountine music in his sleep. poor guy. pity's on him, from me.

and then there's royston. going for his debating on a saturday. he claimed it interesting though, so no complaints there. :D

sheng ming randomly wanted to camwhore with me, so there you have it,

me trying on his glasses, ckp style.

"EH YOU TWO LOOK ALIKE. YOUR BROTHER AH MATTHEW."

and then things got crazier,

sheng ming with ashraf's basketball pump, trying to make it look like some giant injection of toxic mako energy or something.
sorry for the blur photos and the blocking finger.
apparently taken by someone who has shaky hands and lousy photography skills ALTOGETHER. TSK TSK TSK. bad photographer, you know who you are. xD

okay! that wraps up everything for this week. (i think.)
besides catechism.
i'll try to find time to blog about my lessons soon.
what am i saying?
i'll MAKE time to blog about my lessons soon!
(oh dear i'm being brainwashed by my poly lecturers already.)

and then i just started crying for no reason on the dining table.
i was like thinking to myself, "FUCK, WHAT AM I DOING."

my mum asked what was wrong.

"why are you crying?! you lost something is it?"

maybe it was because it was dinner time and i didn't want to embarrass myself.
or maybe it was because sunday dinners are the only meals my family had together.
these words just slipped out off my mouth, naturally.

"aiya mummy, don't be silly lah. i lose something i also won't cry until like that. i'm fine."

i don't cry if i lose something, aye?
why can't i DON'T cry if i lose ANYTHING?

the feeling of being appreciated.

2008-04-08T13:14:00.006+08:00

The Alamo Is No Place For Dancing- The Scene Aesthetic

Sing me a song, tell me about
The things you're dealing with lately
I don't understand how you could
Sing to me lies, let them linger
Inside of me, give me a reason
To stay with you, just let me know
So I can run away faster than ever before

Counting down all of the hours I've spent here
Drowning in all of your lies dear
I wish that I could have been warned
So I'll tell them steer clear of Texas
To warn them and let them all know what's in store
To let them all know what's in store

I can't tell you how much I'd love to take back every word I said
You gave me every reason to ignore the lies you fed me then
And I'm so sorry dear, I must escape before you suffocate me
So I waited patiently as long as I could
Fought so hard for a girl, that I loved
But who later turned out to be someone I hardly knew

Counting down all of the hours I've spent here
Drowning in all of your lies dear
I wish that I could have been warned
So I'll tell them steer clear of Texas
To warn them and let them all know what's in store
To let them all know what's in store
(To let them all know you're a whore)

Spent a lot of my time trying to make this alright, trying to make this alright
Spent a lot of my time trying to make this alright, trying to make this alright
Alone now, I hope this is all that you wanted
Spent a lot of my time trying to make this alright, trying to make this alright
And you'll be alone till, the time that you change, but you'll never change
Spent a lot of my time trying to make this alright, trying to make this alright
Alone now, I hope this is all that you wanted
Spent a lot of my time trying to make this alright, trying to make this alright
And you'll be alone till, the time that you change, but you'll never change
Alone now, I hope this is all that you wanted
And you'll be alone now, I hope this is all that you wanted

my dad's been a little weird lately. just today he called home for no reason,
"hey, your eye okay already ah? i mean, no more pain, or bleeding, and can see clearly and all already right?"
"uuuuh... yeah. why?"
"you not going out today meh?"
"don't want lah, its raining."
"oh okay, take care at home okay? bye."

maybe its because he read about what i blogged about him.
GASPS.

enough of that.
or maybe its coz he knows that everytime he pisses me off or impacts something so dearly in my life, i would turn to friends i can find to complain. which would sometimes be my church friends. why is this relavent you may ask? most of my church friends are in this ministry, a ministry led by (yes you've guessed it.) my father. and if my friends have the thinking that their chairman is such the weak parent they know of their friend matthew, what of their ministry? right?

back to church friends.
been hanging around corn and sam for quite some while, you can add and substract aaron tan, jon chow, irwin, and maybe even wen long once in awhile.
but mainly this two.
for the band concerts, its corn, sam, wen long and jon chow.
for the gyms, you get corn, sam again, and sometimes aaron tan.
and for the lunches after church, its corn and sam, AGAIN. and maybe irwin.

so we went to the gym the other day, they wanted to swim afterwards but i was like being a big sissy boy going NOOOOOOOOOO let's all swim at my place instead.

and so they did.

camwhored for awhile.
sam insisted i turned off the lights, so he could sleep on my "comfy" bed.

me and corn were camwhoring when all of a sudden,
"GASPS A GHOST BEHIND US."
and we're like, "HEY THAT'S A DAMN NICE EFFECT LAH."

sam using his handphone light, corn and i still pretending to be spooked out.

me turning emo,

and then corn getting tired.

and there you have it, the HOLY TUNER wards off the evil samuel spirit!

caught up with kyna the other day, she talked more on her project work and bitched more about how stressful jc life was.

stressed? spell it backwards and you'll find the solution.

i don't know how, but it finally did HIT her to ask me where i got posted to:
remember that, and hammer it into your head.

yeah, that method would probably work, aye?

its like i'm going around forcing people to change their msn display names.
its really not my fault!
and hazel was telling me about how catechism class sucked without me.
(no, really. she said that.)
should i go to a class that appreciates me more, or a class that needs me more?
is this serving my needs, or the needs of the youth?

yeah, i'm such an evil catechist. martina is so gonna kill me thinking, "why did i ever let this bastard join?" or even, "when the fuck did his rascal join in the first place? he's corrupting the teens."

*edited*
anyway, i've just been to tampines mall to get irwin's present.
how am i supposed to wrap that **** dammed thing?
went to eat dinner at the halal food court,
which didn't really count as dinner.
so anyway, went for 2nd dinner at ben&jerry's at white sands.
corn hijacked sam's psp to play "who wants to be a millionaire?"
this is what he got on his first question,

"HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW?"

"ASK AARON, HE'S BEEN DYING TO TOUCH MY PSP. WHAT A SMARTASS. LADY'S UNDERWEAR BRAND ALSO KNOW."

"hey, thanks for making things between me and her work out. i really owe you one matt."

"nah, all i did was inject poisonous rubbish and toxic nonsense into both your minds that made you two reconcile. you just followed obediently like the singaporeans you all are."

"oh, okay. o.0 thanks anyway. :)"

the duo concerts.

2008-04-08T11:57:00.003+08:00

Your Ex-Lover Is Dead- Stars

God that was strange to see you again
Introduced by a friend of a friend
Smiled and said 'yes I think we've met before'
In that instant it started to pour,
Captured a taxi despite all the rain
We drove in silence across Pont Champlain
And all of the time you thought I was sad
I was trying to remember your name...

This scar is a fleck on my porcelain skin
Tried to reach deep but you couldn't get in
Now you're outside me
You see all the beauty
Repent all your sin

It's nothing but time and a face that you lose
I chose to feel it and you couldn't choose
I'll write you a postcard
I'll send you the news
From a house down the road from real love...

Live through this, and you won't look back...
Live through this, and you won't look back...
Live through this, and you won't look back...

There's one thing I want to say, so I'll be brave
You were what I wanted
I gave what I gave
I'm not sorry I met you
I'm not sorry it's over
I'm not sorry there's nothing to save

I'm not sorry there's nothing to save...

lol sorry had to change the music again.
just think house of wolves was too rock-ish,
the people complain. XD
anyway, it reflects what i'm been through,
(mostly.)

as you read from my previous post,
i went to the band concerts of sac and my very own ex-school.

i have requests like,
"hey matt, why you never blog about the concerts!"

or,

"which one did you prefer?"

both are equally, EQUALLY enjoyable.
not because i don't wanna get killed by band people from both sides,
but because i've been in st pats so long,
and i've heard them play all the time.
so its just the same like how we asians eat rice.
enjoyable. but used to it.
its like something you go just to appreciate their music.
even if you're alone,
like when you're eating alone.

and sac is like something you go with friends for.
enjoyable ALSO,
because of the company.
not that their performance is BAD,
but its better when you go with friends.
like a reneunion dinner i would say?

what the hell am i blogging about, matthew han.

anyway i saw someone during the sac concert.
corn was like,
"EH THERE, I SEE YOUR EX-GIFLRIEND ALREADY."

i instantly turned away.
jon chow asked me,
"why you so scared her for what? not saying she can do anything to you like that."

that question,
was something i really couldn't answer.

maybe i'm not afraid anymore,
maybe she simple just stinks.
or maybe we love avoiding trouble?

that time you called me on new year's eve,
what was it all about?

"i called you just coz i think you're a good entertainer,
i didn't mean anything else. so don't get any wrong ideas."

oh yeah, and to the other girl,
your best friend said i needed to give you time.
tell you what,
here, i'll give you ALL the time you want.
i won't bother you anymore.

more relief teaching.

2008-04-01T21:55:00.005+08:00

House Of Wolves- My Chemical Romance

Well, I know a thing about contrition,
Because I got enough to spare.
And I'll be granting your permission,
'Cause you haven't got a prayer.
Well I said hey, hey hallelujah,
I'm gonna come on sing the praise.
And let the spirit come on through ya,
We got innocence for days!

Well, I think I'm gonna burn in hell,
Everybody burn the house right down.

And say, ha
What I wanna say
Tell me I'm an angel,
Take this to my grave.
Tell me I'm a bad man,
Kick me like a stray.
Tell me I'm an angel,
Take this to my grave.

(S-I-N, I S-I-N
S-I-N, I S-I-N
S-I-N, I S-I-N
S-I-N, I S-I-N)

You play ring around the ambulance,
Well like you never gave a care.
So get the choir boys around you,
It's a compliment, I swear.
And I said, ashes to ashes, we all fall down,
I wanna hear you sing the praise,
I said, ashes to ashes, we all fall down,
We got innocence for days!

Well, I think I'm gonna burn in hell,
Everybody burn the house right down.

And say, ha
What I wanna say
Tell me I'm an angel,
Take this to my grave.
Tell me I'm a bad man,
Kick me like a stray.
Tell me I'm an angel,
Take this to my grave.

You better run like the devil,
'Cause they're never gonna leave you alone!
You better hide up in the alley,
'Cause they're never gonna find you a home!
And as the blood runs down the walls,
You see me creepin' up these halls.
I've been a bad motherfucker
Tell your sister I'm another
Go! Go! Go!

And I said, say,
What I wanna say
Tell me I'm an angel,
Take this to my grave.
Tell me I'm a bad man,
Kick me like a stray.
Tell me I'm an angel,
Take this to my grave.

Tell me I'm a bad, bad, bad, bad man.
Tell me I'm a bad, bad, bad, bad man.
Tell me I'm a bad, bad, bad, bad man.
Tell me I'm a bad, bad, bad, bad man.
So get up!
So get out!
S-I-N, I S-I-N!

you know the lyrics of the song always confused me.
"S-I-N-I-S-I-N."

its either,
SIN, I SIN.

or....

SIN, IS IN.

haven't been blogging for a long time, been busy lately.
oh wells.

today i woke up with small wounds all over my body.
my feet,
my neck,
my hands,
and all over my back,
were all bleeding.

bed bug alert, bed bug alert, bed bug alert, bed bug al...

anyways i've been going back to st ants again.
to help out the prefects' on their founder's day celebration.

WHOA MY PE TEACHER CAN DO A SLAM-DUNK.

or maybe a music teacher? LOL.

anyway the highlights for founder's day were on anti-bullying, and peer mediation.
they had skits for both, and even a poster to stop bullying,

drawn by primary school people.
we only helped in the painting aye.

and here you see the little kiddos practicing their skit in aunty shakti's counselling room,

man jia and qin han are supposed to bump each other.

with the two prefects/mediators in the centre.

"what's your name?"
"HAN."
"your full name please, that kor kor also han."
"QIN HAN LAH."

getting carried away,

alexstine got distracted too, hijacked my phone to snap mr woo and dominic whilst marking his maths test.

an example of his maths test,

its no wonder he got bored aye.

their final practices in the hall,

and after founder's day. :D

helped ms siva compile her survey forms,

someone who wrote an interesting date. :D

when for steamboat after founder's day,

the DHL balloon. (Deliver Halfway Lost.)
nobody seemed to give poor ms siva her seat in the train.
we had to camp, and prove how seat-ridden she was.

until she finally got her seat in the mrt. LOL.
(look at her ankle please.)

went for sac and st pats band concerts.
lazy to comment,
or maybe,
its not worth commenting.

the fries corn, sam, wen long, and me had to share for our "SUPPER."

girl confrontation.

2008-03-31T01:33:00.004+08:00

You Give Love A Bad Name- Atreyu

Shot through the heart
And you’re to blame.
Darling you give love a bad name.
FUCK YOU!

An angel’s smile is what you sell.
You promise me heaven, then put me through hell.
Chains of love got a hold on me.
When passion’s a prison, you can’t break free.

Ohh, you’re a loaded gun. (yeah)
Ohh, There’s nowhere to run.
No one can save you
The damage is done.

Shot through the heart
And you’re to blame.
You give love a bad name (bad name).
I play my part and you play your games.
You give love a bad name (bad name).
You give love a bad name.

Paint your smile on your lips.
Blood red nails on your fingertips.
A school boy’s dream, you act so shy.
Your very first kiss was your first kiss goodbye.

Ohh, you’re a loaded gun. (yeah)
Ohh, There’s nowhere to run.
No one can save me
The damage is done.
Shot through the heart
And you’re to blame.
You give love a bad name (bad name).
I play my part and you play your games.
You give love a bad name (bad name).
You give love…

Shot through the heart
And you’re to blame.
Darling you give love a bad name.
I play my part and you play your games.
You give love a bad name.
Shot through the heart
And you’re to blame.
You give love a bad name (bad name).
I play my part and you play your games.
You give love a bad name (bad name).
Shot through the heart
And you’re to blame.
You give love a bad name.
I play my part and you play your games.
You give love a bad name.

nothing's been up lately.
just confronting a lot of girls whom i really really dislike.
(hate is such a strong word.)

leland's emo,
and eventually came back asking for company.

"why didn't you catch up with me this whole week?"

"you see, i'm the kind of person that everybody goes to when they're emo. so if they don't come to me, i'll be happy for them, right?

just not happy for myself."

he told me to take this particular shot at challenger.

for no reason.
waste my phone space only.

just received another "spam" chain email stating that,
whenever you help,
it comes back to pay you double.

don't believe me?
sajiv talked to me one of these days,
and asked what was wrong with me.
(thanks dude. :D)

for some of you who he approached to send him off to the states,
it was probably because it was the first holiday he was ever reluctant to go.
why? as the end of our long holidays inch to us poly people, we feel the urge to catch up with our secondary school mates, lest never being able to keep in touch again.

so i decided to send him off.

surprisingly enough, i was the only one who turned up.
no thanks to me.

have fun in your final vacation sajiv.
LOL.

catechism was another epic failure.

tried to touch more on eastertide, but couldn't help but sidetrack,
all the time!

oh well,
as long as it isn't bad for the children,
it should be alright.
(i hope.)

st ants relief teaching.

2008-03-30T23:37:00.004+08:00

went to st ants last week to babysit primary five people who didn't go for their level camp.
some photos, not gonna go into details.
coz i'm lazy.
and sleepy.
and emo.
and lethargic.
so yeah.

matt, calvin, tarci, gab, and dom. :D

that's how short the tap is, sorry to the green dude i accidentally (note: ACCIDENTALLY) snapped whilst pee-ing.

crumplers.

ah beng's art. the cross represents jesus, the line represents peace coz its in one PIECE, the weird thingy, which is actually a merlion represents singapore, and the last one is actually fingers playing the keys of a piano.

beta tested to draw an indian, but failed.

comparing them to the chinese, angmoh, and malay.

some additional features.

remember ricardo on the toy skit in my youtube account? limited edition one-legged figures sold seperately.

yeah, my own action figure. how cool.

Love is when you break a cookie in two, and give someone else the bigger piece.

is it still love,
if you break the cookie into two,
eat the bigger piece,
eat the smaller piece too,

and you stole the cookie?

the end.

the real victims of love.

2008-03-23T23:35:00.006+08:00

Life Of A Salesman- Yellowcard

What's a dad for dad?
Tell me why I'm here dad
Whisper in my ear that I'm growing up to be a better man, dad
Everything is fine dad
Proud that you are mine dad
Cause I know I'm growing up to be a better man

Father I will always be
That same boy that stood by the sea
And watched you tower over me
Now I'm older I wanna be the same as you

What's a dad for dad?
Taught me how to stand, dad
Took me by the hand and you showed me how to be a bigger man, dad
Listen when you talk, dad
Follow where you walk, dad
And you know that I will always do the best I can
I can

Father I will always be (always be)
That same boy that stood by the sea
And watched you tower over me (over me)
Now I'm older I wanna be the same as you
The same as you

Father I will always be
That same boy that stood by the sea
And watched you tower over me
Now I'm older I wanna be the same as you

(When I am a dad, dad
I'm gonna be a good dad
Do the best you could, dad
Always understood, dad
Taught me what was right, dad
Opened up my eyes, dad
Glad to call you my, dad
Thank you for my life, dad)

happy easter everyone!
sorry for not blogging in awhile.
though it might seem i may not have my readers.
i'll always know i'm being watched and monitored very carefully for my every action.

for lazy people:
this post is like turning into my life story. so don't read.

my dad.

they say he's strict.

just the other day we went on kiasu church visits for holy thursday's adoration.
it ended at 12 midnight and we planned to stop at some church which was at the north side of singapore. not very safe if the buses and night-riders don't go to pasir ris after midnight.

so mark koh, offered us to stay over his place since its close to his place.
knowing my father for the religious man he is, i asked him about mark's suggestion, hoping a higher chance of allowing me to stay over compared to my mum.

and he said no.

but now i really understand why your parents do the things you hate.
remember,
life is all about doing things you hate for the people you love?

i remember once i used this against my dad that almost made him cry.

he asked at the midst of my secondary three life,
"WHY YOU SUDDENLY BECOME LIKE THIS? YOUR FRIENDS TEACH YOU ONE AH."
the smoking, the fights, the "bad" influence.

"IS YOU PUT ME IN ST PATS ONE WHAT. THAT'S WHY I BECOME LIKE THAT LAH."

my dad has always wanted me to go to st pats/sji so bad when i was primary six.
and i finally got accepted by an appeal during the end of my secondary one, he just so happy.

and i was happy too.
i was happy for him.
just not happy for myself.

that also forced me to adapt in this new school. i really hated the first few weeks in this "new school." but things finally came together as i made friends, and how godma told me what it meant to be "lasallian." something so alien to me then.

and for things that are going on now in the house,
i'm just not as good as your daughter is,
making the family "together" again.
but i'm still trying my best to stay home most of the time. :D

here's to my dad,
if you're reading this,
i'm just so sorry for the difficult times you had with me/you're gonna have with me.
and sorry too, for letting the whole world know about this "secret."
but why hide who we really are, aye?
abd i'm really grateful you put me in st pats afterall. :)
thanks dad,
peace out.

went to ryan ho's place just yesterday. (17 mintues ago. its 12:17am now.)
we share the same godma so that makes us...
godbrothers, i guess?

came with gab and martin to accompany my godma and ryan at mass for easter.
and it was $%#$^%$)(*&^%%$^&*^%$#%ret$ew#@^%$-ING crowded.

went to parkway to get the stuffs for his house-warming.
(is that what its called? not first time but still a gathering?)

remember the rachel girl right?
iggy's girlfriend?
never had a good impression of her. yup.

but when i knew this clare girl, things changed.
"HEY IGGY IN MALAYSIA YOU CAN TURN PLAYFUL ALREADY AH."

"IS THAT A SLEEPING GOWN YOU'RE WEARING?"

i almost ALMOST felt sorry for the poor girl.

to all involved parties reading this, no stress on y'all aye. :)

but don't these girls know that when a guy likes them,
they tell it to their mates?
and their friends know about it,
know about the thing that makes them so unhappy all the time,
and the reason behind all the lovestruck boy is this GIRL?

i mean, she does know that we all hate her for making his mood very irregular, right?

if you don't,
NOW YOU DO.

the real sufferers and victims of love,
their friends.

oh, and exactly 6 years ago, my dad's dad passed away.
people often tell me i have this characteristics/personality/habits.

yo opa, happy deathday.

st patty's day.

2008-03-18T00:25:00.000+08:00

went to clarke quay for st. patrick's day parade after palm sunday mass and that horrible cold storage incident.

met up with leland after my "lunch" at the road of our condos.
then met up with dom in eunos.
and the mrt passed eunos like the mrt stop was just non-existent.
i wonder how those commuters who want to get off at eunos alighted.

decided to meet martin at city hall when leland complained about his empty stomach.
so we went to raffles place for some random reason.

saw this mop and that janitor close-by that everyone just simply ignores.
so i helped him on his chore. :)

waited for martin tan, whilst peeking on leland's messages,

sorry lah, same tee.
its the only nice green tee i have.

reached there, and found the juniors trying to sell their mechandise.

THE TURTLE SO CUTE WORHSZXZXZXZ.
and we started the traditional camwhoring.

with mark koh being ridiculously active in it coz he has a new CAMERA!

sorry for the same poses.just trying to maintain the high number or shamrocks in each photograph.

and camwhored with other people too, celebrating st patty's day,

like stormtroopers,

leprechauns,

brother jason,

jedi chicken little,

ian chai the bagpiper,

guinness penguins,

some emo sith chic,

slutty guinness girls, (we know they love being dressed like that. xD)

more starwars fans,

and statues.

its quite fun but shameless trying to be them actually coz ironically we FREEZE to take a photo we're posing for.

and us erm... checking out the lady statue.
"HM, SHE LOOK'S LIKE SHE'S FULL OF PURE BROOOOOOOOOOOONZE."
*perverted look.*

went to fullerton to pee,
from all that beer. (OOPS.)

totally awed with the cool spinning door like kids of tourist parents on a holiday on tropical sunny singapore. :)

then mark kept saying,
"I'M NOT DRUNK I'M JUST HIGH."
he walked straight alright...
straight INTO THE WALL.

but who cares?
HIGH, CAN TAKE MORE PICTURES RIGHT.

oh man goodness i look so neighbourhoodie.

the toilet was GALM.
so much better than patricians' favourite choice at shitting in an outside location,
roxy square.
LOL.

then the uncle who was cleaning the toilet was putting ice cubes into the urinals.
OMG SO EPIC.

MY URINE HAS FROZE WORHSZXZXZ.

and that's marcus not looking at the camera, AGAIN.
yes, he has this thing for not looking at the camera lens.
its happened more than once, but i refrained from uploading too many photos of him doing that already. so its taken care of. :D

went to esplande, disturbed the art at the basement,

patricians always break the rules.

normal typical camwhoring, nothing much.

attempting to get my deserved dose of laughing gas, but failed. due to the drunk photographer.

there's me trying to spoil a nice good cup structure my blowing through the gap.

and there's me trying to spoil a bad photograph from being snapped. LOL.

totally greeeeeeeen and irish.

yes, and i'm still fascinated by escalators.

me and marcus having our racing duel on seperate escalators.

ate at carls junior for dinner.
spoiled everyone's appetitie by acting cute,

which failed miserable again.

then went for this animal riding thing at marina square.

"DRIFT MATTHEW, DRIFT."
my fastest lap timing around the pair of escalators was roughly around 8 minutes.

and yes, i'm half-dead.

"to me, you're already a close friend.
we've been peer leaders together,
we've slept together,
we've done the most randomest thing together like holding hands and skipping around changi airpot,
and you taught me that they're more ways to reach the kingdom of god and be christ-like.

you've made me feel like i may not be the unluckiest asshole in this world, cause there's someone whos an asshole as i am, so i can help him, and he can help me.

what clique? what group? what brotherhood?

fuck them all.

this is friendship. not some gay cult that you form to beat people up over the most fucked up reasons like stepping on your bonsai plant."

st. patrick's day parade.

2008-03-17T03:25:00.000+08:00

ever been played bluff by your parents before?
you know, like the,
"DON'T CRY SO LOUD, LATER THE AHPUNEHNEH COME AND TAKE YOU AWAY SELL YOU TO INDIA."

maybe not that unrealistic, but try,
"EH DON'T CROSS THE ROAD ON YOUR OWN, WAIT THE POLICE COME CATCH YOU."

or this, as you slower get older, the point of your childhood where your parents trust you to come home alone from school,
"MUST HURRY COME BACK BEFORE 6PM, IF NOT LATER THE PONTIANAK(sp?) COME SNATCH YOU TO HER BANANA TREE."

laughable? i think not.
for my sister and i, these parenting tacits were almost, if not completely useless against us.

my old house used to be around tampines street 11, near holy trinity church, so there were quite a few construction works going on then, and i used to always chat with the indian workers there. so yeah.

crossing the road? my sis and i used to jay-walk, ALL THE TIME. police catching you? yeah, as silly as it may sound, we loved prank calling the police during our primary school days. i know we're sick perverts. it got mum and dad into trouble once i think.

6pm? pontianak? my school ended at 6.30pm during the afternoon sessions last time when i was in primary school. i slowly learnt that as long as i believe strongly in god, nothing can harm me. and the only pontianak i would face was the one scolding me alongside with my dad as i reached home late- my mum.

so here's the story,

just yesterday after church i went grocery shopping with my mother since i didn't have to teach catechist that week.
(although i know grocery shopping is a waste of time. i mean, what's the use of buying the bestest, freshest groceries when they're all just gonna be turned and wasted into crappy, ugly, yucky food by a lousy maid?)

so i was happily chucking my tibits/chocolates/sweets/soft drinks/ice-cream and everything else your parents told you not to eat when you were younger,
when suddenly this boy sitting on the cold storage shopping cart child seat, with his starwars stormtrooper lasergun glared at me.

his expression changed,
he pointed his toy gun at me,
and spammed on the trigger like someone suffering from a combined alcohol-overload and a sugar-rush.

after awhile he grew tired and began to learn that no matter how many times he pressed the trigger,
the scum of the earth standing right in front of him wouldn't disappear or at least get out of his face.

too busy on my "stocking up," i just simply ignored the kiddos movements.

that was until he decided to use his weight to inch the shopping cart filled of eeky veggies toward me that i realised that the bugger opposite me, really didn't like me. a lot. (yes i really hate my greens.)

i was squatting down looking for my meiqi chocolate when he just suddenly launched his foot at my back. and i could actually feel the "SNAP" when you crack certain bones in your body.

that actually made my back feel MUCH better.
i mean, with all the computer and video games i've been on without back support for months now, OF COURSE AN OLD MAN LIKE ME COULD USE THE MASSAGE.

i backed off from him and looked back to actually see the rascal trying to fling another kick to me. then, HIS MOTHER SAW.

"eh, don't kick that kor kor. later that kor kor kick you back, you DIE."

WHAT THE BIGBREAKFAST-STUDENT-UPSIZE-MEAL WAS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?!?!?!
ITS EXACTLY LIKE WHAT SOME MAID TOLD ANOTHER KID THAT TRIED TO ASSAULT ME IN MY CONDOMINIUM PARK.

DO THESE KIDS HAVE INFERIOR COMPLEX WHEN THEY FACE ME IN PUBLIC?

WHY IS IT THAT EVERYONE USES ME AS A THREAT WHEN THEY CAN'T CONTROL THEIR OWN
CHILDREN?

WHY NOT COME OUT WITH SOME POLICEMAN/AHPUNEHNEH/PONTIANAK CRAP TO MAKE THEM BEHAVE?

IT MAKES ME LOOK LIKE I'M THE BAD GUY HERE.

then my mother came from the other lane, and heard the conversation.
i told her the whole thing,
and she actually went saying,
"don't lie lah, you were actually planning on kicking that boy back anyway right."

here's to the parents that are the best on earth even if they're not perfect in their arts. coz its only their first go at parenting.
cheers.

*edit*
and here's another to the grandparents, who want to try out their second go at parenting, so that their grandchildren won't be as messed up as their children.
CHEERS!